So I was ready to move and start a new life and then he called and told me that he wanted to work it out no matter what it took. So i said I would talk to him in person before the move and clarified my needs, that are actually very minimal but very important to me. That it was not his job to tell me if I was healing at a good enough pace, that I know myself. That I have no problem with his dreams as a musician as long as there is time for me. That iI need physical contact not just sex. Compliments every once in awhile. If I dis something like the gardening that it was just as important as his job. Not to minimize it because accomplishing them is big for me. So if he did not have anything nice to say dont say it. Also that if I want a drink evey once in a blue moon I dont need critisism or lectures on AA when I dont drink often. He thought it would help me anyway. It just was not comfortable to me. He apologized for forgetting about my needs and was glad that I spelt them out completely. Itold him about his wall he put up from being hurt badly before. That if he pushed me away anymore I would walk. There is no way a relationship can make it if you shut the person you love out.. He admitted he realized that while I was gone and is working on it with help from a good source. Wow what a long week but a good one. It felt so frickn good to stand up for myself. And I am going to continue. Will be starting volunteering at a hospital and continue my healing at my own pace. I found the me I used to be. Anyway thats why I have not been on. But am ready to listen and be there for all you great supporters and friends,