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Dysfunctional boss dance & PTSD ADA accommodation
I'm writing about how my boss continues to drag on my PTSD ADA accommodation at work in detail again here now with a crisis tag for 2 reasons:
1. to document it all with you friends as my witnesses that I wrote it all down as it happened on the same day, and
2. for any advice out there about how to end it in a professional manner.
Here goes: my boss dropped by my office again today Fri. Sept. 8th. Last Friday Sept. 1st she dropped by because she had sent me an email saying she needed to meet with me to "finalize details" about "transitioning" from teaching an extra course as an overload to teaching a normal load.
On Monday Aug. 28th of that last week my boss had met with me, my VP, my HR director, and my union rep and granted me that ADA accommodation--really just the chance to stop teaching overloads and teach a normal load. My boss's follow up to that meeting with Fri. Sept. 1st's email to "finalize details" for "transitioning" sounded like she wanted for me to give her a syllabus and tests for the instructor who'd take my place. That's why I prepared a flash drive loaded with them to give to her Fri Sept 1st.
It turned out, though, that wasn't what she wanted. Instead, she wanted me to go over my PTSD ADA accommodation request on Fri Sept 1st all over again. Without my union rep, without me knowing that was the agenda, and without telling me she was adding new Dean to the mix. I said no last Fri Sept 1st, let's postpone it when my union rep can come with me.
Our offices are 2 doors down from each other, so she saw me in person several times a day after that on Mon Sept 4th and on Tues Sept 5th. She still didn't tell me that unbeknownst to me she rescheduled that meeting I said to postpone Fri Sept 1st for Wed. Sept. 6th in the afternoon, when I had a psychiatrist's appointment anyway.
So today Fri Sept 8th she pops into my office at lunch time with "where were you?" claiming she had emailed me that she'd rescheduled that Wed. Sept. 6th meeting. I looked on our email system and didn't find any such email. She said, though, she got that Dean and my union rep in a room on Wed. Sept. 6th in the afternoon and I was a no show. I've never been late to or absent to a meeting in my 6 years working for her. Today Fri Sept 8th after telling me about it for the first time in person, she said she had to run and left my office.
Not finding the email, I created one of my own after she left today Fri Sept 8th being polite enough to apologize to the Dean and my union rep for not showing up to this Wed Sept 6 rescheduled meeting. I did say, though, that (a) I didn't get notice and, (b) I couldn't have agreed to that time that day because I had a long standing appointment scheduled with my psychiatrist for my PTSD at that time anyway.
Then I asserted myself in the email apology today saying again that it's stressful in itself to talk about PTSD in the workplace. Therefore it would be good if we reschedule again with her and this new Dean to do so on my terms for my support on the day of my next psychiatrist appointment Oct. 3rd.
It didn't matter that I disclosed that I see a psychiatrist because I'd done that way back in 2016. When I got tenure in 2016 I came forward with my diagnosis in a meeting with my VP and HR director warning that I'd need an ADA accommodation to stop teaching overloads some day. So I prepared them last year for what I'd doing now.
Saying, therefore, that my boss ought to set any appointment with this new Dean around my psychiatrist's support was my way of reminding them both that I have VP, HR, legal, my psychiatrist's medical authority lined up to back me, and I do. My Wednesday appointment with my psychiatrist Sept 6th instead of with them brought my psychiatrist up to speed about my boss's missteps, anyway, and he nenewed his pledge of total authority on my behalf.
I'm not really concerned that my boss's repeated odd attempts at sabotage are really going to affect the adjustment of my teaching load to a normal one since the VP already granted that Mon. Aug 28th. I am offended, though, at how she is complicating the situation with some hidden issues of her own for another meeting that is unnecessary to begin with.
My boss is playing out some issue of her own with this, then. I think it's that she was revealed in that Mon Aug 28th meeting before the VP, HR, and my union rep as having overloaded me for years now. I thinks she's keen to get me into a meeting not needed for my purposes with this new Dean to try to cover her tracks with him somehow. Though it's not my problem, her trying to involve me in her office politics issue she's playing out with her bosses takes undue energy from me over something that for me and everyone else is a done deal.
I'm not going anywhere for 3 more years until retirement. I like my classes and my students, so quitting isn't an option. I'm not concerned enough to even think about doing that anyway. I have tenure, after all. But I would like to end this little dysfunctional dance she keeps wanting to dance with me. My crisis is that I keep thinking I've addressed it and she keeps wanting to do some more dysfunctional dancing anyway.
So again, I'm writing about this in detail once more here now with a crisis tag for 2 reasons:
1. to document it all with you friends as my witnesses that I wrote it all down as it happened the same day, and
2. for any advice out there about how to end this dysfunctional dance in a professional manner. Thanks.
I have a good absurd sense of humor, so if I can get that to kick in I think I'll be able to lighten up some. Tonight I went to town and had me some fun in Chinatown and then at an Irish pub, and I was able to unwind a little. Met a nice couple of guys I was able to chew the fat with. Tomorrow's the first NFL football Sunday, too, so I can get myself good and distracted with that, too.
Gracias por la permission to loosen up some. :-)
I think emailing and asking her what her point of all this would be is a good idea too . CCing all parties involved if possible. Can you lay down the law and say hey, this is the last time we are going to do this dance and that it's a done deal? You've cooperated and done things by the book. I wonder if SHE needs to be required to start CCing the Dean and your union rep whenever she sends you one?Only so it keeps you out of the loop as much as possible avoiding unneeded stress. It does sound like she's covering something up on her end.
Sorry if I repeated any comments or suggestions