Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
I've only just come across the term complex PTSD, and so far every single thing about it seems to sum me up entirely... I'm actually quite excited. It makes sense. Maybe there's some hope for me if there's a reason for me being the way I am.
I dissociate all the time. Nothing ever feels real to me, almost everything every day feels like a strange dream. I rarely feel like I'm in my own skin.
And the memory stuff too... I've always had the worst memory. Seriously sometimes I can't remember where I've been that day. I might be sat on a train and sometimes I'll actually have to concentrate to remember why.
I've always recoiled from the term PTSD, which is extremely silly really. It's because the Step-Dad who abused me had PTSD and I never wanted to have anything in common with him. And it never fit properly either. I never had one shocking trauma, my entire childhood was one long series of traumas. But that's supposed to be where Complex PTSD differs from regular PTSD.
It's so hard to commit to study or to do anything. I'd love advice from anyone who else who has complex PTSD, what sort of therapy or help is there available?
I dissociate all the time. Nothing ever feels real to me, almost everything every day feels like a strange dream. I rarely feel like I'm in my own skin.
And the memory stuff too... I've always had the worst memory. Seriously sometimes I can't remember where I've been that day. I might be sat on a train and sometimes I'll actually have to concentrate to remember why.
I've always recoiled from the term PTSD, which is extremely silly really. It's because the Step-Dad who abused me had PTSD and I never wanted to have anything in common with him. And it never fit properly either. I never had one shocking trauma, my entire childhood was one long series of traumas. But that's supposed to be where Complex PTSD differs from regular PTSD.
It's so hard to commit to study or to do anything. I'd love advice from anyone who else who has complex PTSD, what sort of therapy or help is there available?
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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First, I hope everyone is doing well, and continuing to fight that good fight! Keep up the great work on yourselves; I'm rooting for all of you!So, I started doing therapy at the beginning of the year, when I was in my most depressed state, but with my therapist, I made big changes and steps in the right direction. But, over a month ago, she couldn't take my insurance anymore, and I had to stop...
My cPTSD dx is official. Sustained childhood trauma and neglect. I think. Maybe. My most trusted med pros are not big on official labels. They come and go too fast for full recovery. Well. . . I'm not big on labels, either. I kinda trust my med pros in accordance with my personal preferences.
Welcome to the forum, Stran. I hope you find it a good place to explore the question.
From what I understand CPTSD is not officially a diagnose by medical standards.Or in the list of official diagnoses.
However many doctors do believe in its validity and like you said it makes sense.
Only a doc could really give a diagnosis.
A good doctor though may write down PTSD and than treat your CPTSD in a proper way.
From what I understand they can not write CPTSD yet.
It was not me being difficult like my family who are responsible for causing these on me try to make me think I was. They labeled me a bad person for the symptoms of the disorders they themselves caused me with their abuse and neglect and still do.
I know someone will refer you to the Pete Walker website, where he describes complex PTSD (which I have from the oh-so-not-fun of my childhood), but really, diagnosis is up to the pros. We're the patients. Like Arfie, I have that official dx, but I'm new to the dx relatively speaking. (Dx'd 2013, long long story.)
Therapy options vary from none to intensive in-patient, and we here have had experience with ust about all of 'em to some extent. I do talk/cognitive behavioral therapy twice a week, see a psychiatrist for meds every other month, come here a lot, and have had ot learn it's okay to be terrified, in tears, and exhausted.
I don't believe there's any such thing as "regular" or "simple" PTSD. It's a complex issue no matter its cause---prolonged fstruggle for survival of the self in childhood because of abuse/neglect/etc. or combat or being an ER doc or nurse, or whatever it is.... Trauma is trauma, and it fries our brains and souls. Car accident or getting born to a (expletive) like my dad, it's still trauma.
Gentle purrs of welcome, and I hope that you can find a therapist to do some screening on you to see what exact issues you face.
Leo
That said, it is entirely possible that you might have CPTSD, but like Leo discussed, it's up to the experts to diagnose you. Dissociation is a possible symptom, so that's a thread you can follow as you start to do your own research, but I'd recommend speaking to a therapist, too, who can guide you and create a safe environment so you can begin to heal.
Additional resources I can point you to:
Muji and I both like Pete Walker's website and book. He's not for everyone, but I'd be remiss if I didn't mention him b/c the technique for shrinking my inner critic has been one of the most important tools in my ongoing recovery. His explanation of the four F responses to trauma type might resonate with you also:
http://www.pete-walker.com/fourFs_TraumaTypologyComplexPTSD.htm
I have also healed quite a bit by reading and doing exercises in books geared towards healing the children of narcissists. Again, it would be up to the experts to determine if your step-father was a narcissist, but if that's what caused him to act out against you physically, you might find some comfort in books that explore that issue.
Best wishes to you as you begin to explore your trauma. We're glad you're here, and I hope the wonderful people on this site bring you as much comfort as they've brought me.