My mother

I'd rather not share right now. I'm sorry. I am trying to figure something out. is it wrong I asked?

No, it's fine to ask. It's fine to read and reply to whatever you're comfortable with. Everyone is at different stages and has different needs. Sometimes it helps just to feel less alone.

dash, earlier you told me the same thing and i answered "ok" but i actually felt there was something wrong. but seeing your full answer here, i more understand it. because i think you just told me "i'd rather not share right now." so i was a little disgruntled and i decided to drop it. but now i want you to know i believe i understand why and it makes sense to me. not very long ago i had a couple other similar situations were someone asked me a question about myself and i answered but when i asked the same question back, i was told that they don't like to share that kind of information. that is a bit mean in a community that tries to foster friendship. sorry, i hope i'm not being mean myself. i really do find your questions thought provoking and i hope you eventually come back with some interesting findings or something. i hope you are not bothered by the thoughs that are on my mind. currently i'm processing lots of troubles including what caused my ptsd, if anything and if i actually do have it. and i do hope you figure out what you are trying to figure out.

It's totally fine with me if you're trying to figure something out and don't feel ready to share. I was only asking to show that I am interested and ready to help where I can. You are fine to be here in what ever way works for you. You should only share when and if you feel safe and comfortable to do so. We are each here for our own reasons and our own healing, so we are not here to please anybody or meet anybody's expectations.

patti thanks for understanding.
extra I'm sorry I disgruntled you. I'm not trying to be mean. I just don't feel comfortable opening up to strangers or anyone. I'm sorry. I just wanted to know I wasn't alone. I'm sorry.
donna thanks for understanding.

War. As a kid, not an adult. Overseas. 6 years. No evacuation. You?

Your not alone Dash. Many of us experienced traumatic abuse early and then continued abuse, because it was the norm in our world.
Physical, emotional, sexual abuses before 6, a 16 year relationship/abusive marriage, loss of second husband to cancer and others significant in my family/friends. ...early deaths of 2 brothers (23/35 yrs) and more, even caught in a tornado. Then there also the things I did, but survived with mental scars. When I came here I joined all the boards that applied, that list was depressing. But her and a few others I felt the most comfort and support, so I whittled the list. Other boards actually triggered me quite a bit ( I visualize too well).

Sorting and coming out with some of it depends on what I am currently feeling.
Asking questions was how I finally learned that I was not alone, and then to let go of some of it.
As Donna and Patti said this is something you choose when and if you are ready.

We collectively have seen a lot ( and shared some learning), so you are not alone here.
Keep asking.
J.

I believe it's from the genes. Inherited from either your father or mother's genes.

jewells thanks

Humantera that's part of the equation, but a lot of hurt happens when we ask or cry for help and that's not answered. So nature and nurture work to help and hurt.
Inquisitive minds find new information to draw on.

Example : we are a glass of lemonade, it needs some sugar to balance the sour, but how much? Depending on the amount of lemons and water used it varies.

Of course that's very simple, but lemons are born to sourness and take nurturing or learning to get the right sweetness....but I am very visual.

Repeated traumas, surgeries, injuries, childhood, being raped, etc.