No sweetie you are not alone. In even gentle, high functioning homes kids are raised to "act right" - manners, habits, values, fitting into expectations about who they are supposed to be. I think most people are subject to this. I sure was. And I did not want to be the "seen but not heard", prissy little no life of my own droid they wanted me to be.

The stress of being who we really are is that it may separate us from the crowd- make us subject to notice, or disapproval. I am now a pretty individualized person, and it has often placed distance between myself and some others- family included. I like the healthy parts about who I am; and I built my professional career using my individuality as my corner stone. There are people in my life who like me for who I really am.

But no doubt, taking this road shakes things up. There is safety in numbers, and even now I often just keep quiet with most people about most of who I am. When you start being yourself you step off the well established path, and it may eventually rearrange pretty thoroughly who you know and what you do. BUT it also lets you feel genuine, free, alive, and open to living a life that is YOUR LIFE.

Years ago I spent a lot of time reading biographies of people who had made unusual accomplishments, had gained renown. None of these people had started out with the idea of being remarkable, it has just a combination of circumstance and their own individual way of seeing things that turned them into icons.

You can reduce the stress by making changes/choices in baby steps. But I hope you do inch your way along that path. For me sometimes it's lonely, but it's always worth it to be me.

I have often wished I could have that problem. Guess it's kinda like all the folks who wish they could have my underweight problem. The grass is always greener...

But, I never have had the acting skills to pull it off. Me is all I am smart enough to be.

Sigh.

I was never even housebroken enough to be in a misfit gang. Poor me.

you're not alone. i'd love to try to be myself, but i got lost in all the years of being who others told me to be or expected me to be.