Another year of not being able to participate in the marathon to remember my fellow Oklahoman's that fateful day that changed us and awoke us all from a 'day dream' living in the Heartland of America!
Last year this time I was in the Hospital having another 5 hour surgery 'Revision of total knee replacement ' and was really angry being alone in the Hospital during the Bombing anniversary! To have another year of therapy and hopes of waking the 3k were never realistic , since I am still learning how to walk again this year! Presently the complications of both new replacement failures have caused so much agony I refuse to leave my home anymore!
I have my own personal North Korean torture camp that I pay to rip my bones out and implant un aligned metal implants that unhinge everyday! Growing up in chronic pain for 38 years I never again want to live out of a pain pill bottle again, so i refuse to accept pain medication the last 15 years and just grit my teeth until I break them and have to go the dentist all the time! So if you suffer long life chronic pain I suggest buying a mouth guard!
The wounds from surviving that day April 19, 1995 make my scars hurt and i hate not being the strong fighter I once was and allowing defeat to darken my doorways with depression and fear of not wanting to go back under the scalpel! They have to catch me for the next 2 revision procedures, because I am going to hunker down and just stay safe hidding in my home/castle/prision listening to to the train go by my house thinking about the final solution!
i like this article. I’ve sent it to important people, select friends and family, in my life who aren’t bipolar to help them understand bipolar (as much as that is possible). I think it does a pretty good job on helping explain, in layman’s terms, for example, how a person with bipolar thinks. Just sharing. Your thoughts?https://natashatracy.com/bipolar-disorder/how-bipolar-thinks/
I can't take much more of this rollercoaster of stress. On top of the stress of my nephew and his parents (long story I won't go into) and my own family issues of chronic illness I have had something very mean said to me last night. This is your warning that the following may very well trigger ANY AND EVERYONE. I have walking issues and pain due to osteoarthritis and use a walker with a...