Yes Ive had a dream , many like this , church and all.

In person always backfired on me. Yet I did it anyway cause thats me!

I really think that Abusers abuse for so long and are so unaware that they abuse and I became a door mat, scapegoat, people pleaser, that when I finally stood up It shocked then and scared them.
There are two in particular that had better never ever even come into my line of view, but they know this.
I use to want reconciliation. Now I dont. I dislike them that much. There are times when it really ate me up. but now i dont care.

In a dream only. Mine are both long dead.

Which makes the dreams VERY scary, really, since I know I'm talking ot dead people. Eeep.

I think the way to go is to do it in imagation. Then their responses don't matter, only the sense of reclaiming our voices. Bu tthat's me.

I'd have like dreconciliation but I think even by the time they passed some 20 years ago and more.... I knew that was not possible. I was already well away from the fam and really only was around for my mom's sake.

I've done this many times in 'day' dreams.... Over and over again.... Sometimes I can't turn them off and I wonder how much could have been settled in some form if I had only done it..

I tend to feel so guilty about almost everything in life that I probably would have felt guilty about that as well

My memory sux about so much but never that part of my life

Big hug for you muji..... Good for you wellbe.... That took courage and I agree with you on how abusers don't see what they don't want to....x

Big hug for you to Leo... We posted at the same time...x

I have confronted two separate abusers in real life and both of them denied it full force.................

I saw a Dr Phil episode about a week ago and this father regularly put his hands on his wife and children... Huge rage 'issues'
He was very aggressive with his 11 year old son... Choked him and hit his head on his headboard for what he considered punishment

Dr Phil spoke with the child off of the stage and he said that he thought he deserved it...
When the father was confronted with everything you could see the shock and reality check really sink in..

. He'd blinded himself to his behaviour as did the Mother... Fortunately for this family they'll receive wonderful treatment and are now faced with CPS as well

Sorry to butt in so much muji....I find this topic particularly interesting to me...It's something that I've thought about so many times....x

I was able to speak it twice in person, often now in dreams of those past, but in my dreams now they are forced away. John at work.

I used to have tons of nightmares in which I did scream at my abuser(s), Very strange, because it is the exact opposite from what I would do in reality.

I would not give them the time of day, just let them blabber or stare and I would just avoid them.

That was a teaser, muji!

I did it in real life to my parents, and it was like hitting myself in the head with a toaster. Actually, my dad was apologetic, but didn't change his behavior. That is, until my mother's affair broke him...

I don't dream about it- just about my mother's dysfunction.

Maybe I should write a letter... Oops- I forgot. I did that and it didn't do any good.

Maybe I should write a letter to ME as my MOTHER. That would be a trip.

(SSS- Sorry So Sarcastic!)

I did it for real to one of them, but it didn't do any good because they just denied it. Then ended up getting arrested anyway for something else. He's screwed up though and has always been violent and cruel. (My dad.) Now, the one guy that raped me will be getting confronted, but that is a process.

Notn quite... Though I did have a dream where he was trying to get me on the street and my best friend swooped in and took my hand, leading me away.
It was empowering and really helpful. It was a nice reminder that he can never hurt me again because I won't let it happen, and those around me won't let it happen.

Yes. I dreamed that I got ahold of and reported sharron and he was arrested and taken to jail. It felt great. But when I wake up I cry inside (too numb to cry aloud) because I know he'll NEVER be punished.

Glad to see I'm not the only one. Let me know if what I think I see we all have in common is true, ok? That whether we confront our abusers in our dreams or in reality, we do it for ourselves, not to bring them around. They deny no matter what. We speak the truth to establish the record for ourselves, right?

Amen Muji. Confronting is the ultimate self validation!