Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
I am taking a Time Out from work today. It is also my business. When I get this anxious, when I feel the pressure mounting, and no perceivable trigger, I take a day off from work. I shouldn't be driving anyway. I am beginning to feel very nauseated, and have the usual accompanying head ache.
What is escalating also is my living situation, and the need for my own place. When i became so ill with PTSD, I lost my home on the very last day that my youngest child left home for his very own life. i remember the eviction notice and the courier appearing at my front door almost at the same time my beloved son was leaving through the same door for university, and his great future. My home got stolen from me by a bunch of lawyers who raised the association fees from $50.00 per month to $300.00 per month. I was a single mom and despite the fact that I had paid their illegal fees, the one month I could only pay a portion of the payment, they began foreclosure on my home, and I had to leave. Although they committed breach of contract, they still took possession of my home, and auctioned my home off, while on the steps of the city courthouse. After having raised my children as a single parent with no child support (dead beat spouse), I had no money left to pursue a suit in a court of law, and no health to carry through with it.
I was extremely ill with PTSD, and homeless. While homeless, I found meaningful work, started a business and finally was able to supply a roof over my head. I moved in with a friend who rented me a room for however long I wanted. I have been renting from her for 8 years now. My landlord's life is changing. She is trying to work a brutal job and still enjoy life. For the past months she has brought in a series of "boyfriends" who get weirder and weirder. This last one is especially off the wall, and I don't feel safe here anymore. Also, in order to grow my business further, i need a place of my own.
Enter the economy: Where I live is now a "boomtown" where even the cost of rent is completely inflated and unaffordable for me. I most likely will never be able to own my own home again. My social security and business profits would not cover the inflated rent prices. It looks like my only choice is renting still another room and live in a situation where i have little or no control over what happens to my shelter or me.
Now I can see why I am triggered, and why I feel so awful. I don't see choices here. I am also trying to downsize my possessions, which is not going well. My goal is to find a place of my own in which to live, but I see my choices closing down. I don't know what to do. When I downsize, pack up and become ready to move, I fear there will be no choices then, as there are no choices now. Also, I had nightmares last night about this very same plight.
Aha! I can see the triggers of this PTSD occurrence, which is not quite an episode - yet. The truth is, i really don't like where my life is right now, or, where it has been since 2001, and I see no way to progress.
Do any of you have advice for me? I am beginning not to see any way through this problem.
Thank You!
What is escalating also is my living situation, and the need for my own place. When i became so ill with PTSD, I lost my home on the very last day that my youngest child left home for his very own life. i remember the eviction notice and the courier appearing at my front door almost at the same time my beloved son was leaving through the same door for university, and his great future. My home got stolen from me by a bunch of lawyers who raised the association fees from $50.00 per month to $300.00 per month. I was a single mom and despite the fact that I had paid their illegal fees, the one month I could only pay a portion of the payment, they began foreclosure on my home, and I had to leave. Although they committed breach of contract, they still took possession of my home, and auctioned my home off, while on the steps of the city courthouse. After having raised my children as a single parent with no child support (dead beat spouse), I had no money left to pursue a suit in a court of law, and no health to carry through with it.
I was extremely ill with PTSD, and homeless. While homeless, I found meaningful work, started a business and finally was able to supply a roof over my head. I moved in with a friend who rented me a room for however long I wanted. I have been renting from her for 8 years now. My landlord's life is changing. She is trying to work a brutal job and still enjoy life. For the past months she has brought in a series of "boyfriends" who get weirder and weirder. This last one is especially off the wall, and I don't feel safe here anymore. Also, in order to grow my business further, i need a place of my own.
Enter the economy: Where I live is now a "boomtown" where even the cost of rent is completely inflated and unaffordable for me. I most likely will never be able to own my own home again. My social security and business profits would not cover the inflated rent prices. It looks like my only choice is renting still another room and live in a situation where i have little or no control over what happens to my shelter or me.
Now I can see why I am triggered, and why I feel so awful. I don't see choices here. I am also trying to downsize my possessions, which is not going well. My goal is to find a place of my own in which to live, but I see my choices closing down. I don't know what to do. When I downsize, pack up and become ready to move, I fear there will be no choices then, as there are no choices now. Also, I had nightmares last night about this very same plight.
Aha! I can see the triggers of this PTSD occurrence, which is not quite an episode - yet. The truth is, i really don't like where my life is right now, or, where it has been since 2001, and I see no way to progress.
Do any of you have advice for me? I am beginning not to see any way through this problem.
Thank You!
-
Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
-
Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
My story can't compare. I have my hubby, who is 90 percent supportive angel and 10 percent human being and prone to irritate he** outta me. (And I know I irk him in reverse.)
That said.... Our HOA here? Loathsome people. It was easygoing eight years ago when we moved in, but the a-holes are in control. They foreclosed on *four* homes in a *small* neighborhood in three months----for fees, of course---and everyone's home price has dropped enough as a result that none of us can move. And Hubby and I should. We don't need this much space. And the new HOA board won't approve us renting my formerly-known-as-mom-suite to anyone. And so on.... So I can sympathize on the effing HOA grrrrrrs.
For the rest.... Odd as it sounds, does your area have ShareSpace office space for businesses? Near here there's a place that rents by hour, day, month, just little glassed cubicles, everyone does their own thing, when and as needed. It's how Hubby met clients before his company got their office open. So that might be available?
Also, what about seeking out advice from a local business networking group or so on? They might know where you can get low-interest loans for business space.
As for residence, yikes, I'd feel unsafe too! I wish I had advice on that end. But crazy as it sounds, look into foreclosures on condos maybe? Apply to Habitat for Humanity for help fixing up a place?
Wish I could teleport the former-mom-suite to you. (One bed, one bath, kitchenette, sunny sitting room with fireplace, and laundry room!).... That'd solve both problems!
Gentle hugs, Urban. It's a tangle, isn't it?
For instance you've said you want to down size your possessions.... Even though there are bound to be attachments to some that shouldn't be too hard... You could perhaps sell some or have a garage sale...Maybe donate a few things?
I realize that I'm trying to sound very practical and you're talking about emotion... I think that making some of this practical can be a wonderful gift to you... Big hug... I know that it isn't easy....xo
Getting back to your help: Every single comment helps. How I WISH and how I have prayed for a healthy, loving marriage, but it never happened, and I HATE these circumstances, and having to deal with this fall out of being single.
So, thank you for your comments, and sharing your "weird" experiences.
Today I am doing a little better. I am anticipating getting myself to my work. i am also anticipating babysitting my baby grandson so my daughter can go to the gym today. it will be a full day, and hopefully will take my mind off of my all-too-real situation.