Jesus, Mary and Joseph it's been a while!!! (Please don't get offended with the very first thing i said, it's a family thing) ANYWAY!! so ya know, i took a break from this site because it was getting far too depressing and sinking me further and further down. According to my friend i haven't exactly been normal, I was very Spacey, anxious, down, just being the Debby Downer. He was concerned but i ran away from him. Anyway recently something happened that kicked me back up. I found a little thing called joy.

Joy, is something i haven't felt in SUCH a long time. I went to a dog park that had an agility course in it. I decided to try it out. My dog had fun, i had fun, overall that Saturday I was never happier. Now my dog gets to sleep with me in bed and i wake up earlier to see his little face peaking through the sheets. He would start to​ lick my face until i was up. I... Can't describe how it feels to be so... So motivated. I had terrible thoughts and he would pop through them and make me feel better. I'm thinking about talkin' to my therapist about him becoming a service dog. Not sure how that would work, but worth a shot. 

My grades have been horrible (like 8.5% terrible) and only recently have i bumped that grade up to a 70. AN 8.5 TO A 70!! God it felt amazing looking at my grades and not feeling like utter trash. 

I've been doing a lot of journaling that's also helped a bit. I look back on when i first started and i was so hard on myself... Little things like stuttering made me call myself a failure. I recently didn't know a word and i was reading outloud. I began to establish it and i messed it up a bit, but i found it with a bit of help. 

I've also decided to change my looks. I want to cut my hair, dye it dark blue with red tips. Any.... TIPS... On dying hair for the first time would kinda be nice, if you have any!!!

Anyway so that's my current life right now.... Not a necessary to know, but idk, it felt like this was needed. So much negativity in this world recently.

Anyway, thanks,

-Cry