it takes a lot of strength to be an advocate for yourself and just to navigate the healthcare system requires persistence / perseverance.
I admire your efforts and hope you eventually get the help you deserve.

My track record with doctors is pretty awful, too. I feel like it takes special training to be a patient in today's medical system. I sometimes wonder if creating frustration is the goal or just a side-effect.

Keep trying, sbs. There are answers out there.

Seems to me, if your relationship with your psychologist is working for you, that you might discuss this w/ him/her. My primary care doc prescribes my meds (including sleep,and anti-anxiety) but he collaborates informally w/ my psychologist about where I'm at and what I need.

Mixing psychoactive meds can obviously be an issue, so I like getting my meds all from the same doc.

Maybe you could make a regular scheduled appointment with your primary physician and take w/ you a supportive note from your psychologist. My understanding is that asking for a controlled substance in Urgent Care raises a red flag most any where, particularly if the doc doesn't know you. Which is likely why your short cut backfired.

Do not despair, because you really are on the right track and just need to keep going around detours to get where you need to go. Most people aren't eager to take meds, but the meds can be a great transitional help while you are learning to reel in your symptoms via therapy.

Hope you sleep better soon.

I'm sorry.

I'd find it difficult to imagine that many of us do NOT know how this feels.

I wound up finding a Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner who has helped me with sleeping meds (Clonazepam and Ambien). They help ... a bit.

She's caring, kind, sympathetic, understanding, and very careful with my overall health -- rather risk-averse. She starts with the lowest possible doses, and says, "let's go from there."

Is there a Psychiatric NP near you ??

I wish you peace, health, strength, and ... some sound sleep. It makes all the difference....

Wow oh wow! You really do not know how MUCH I can relate to this.

I admit also: I hate the idea of pills. I hate the idea of having others help me. I dislike anything that deals with medicine. But, I agree with John and David. It takes a lot of courage, strength, and humility to admit that we need help.

My journal entry describes a particular incident that happened this weekend that led me to the psych ER and receive attention. I found out that Clonazepam worked very well for me. Slow to hit the system but effective.

Some doctors can be very ignorant. Sounds like you found one. I am sorry you had to experience this kind of things. It is no fun for sure.

I would like to say one thing about meds however. I was like you very much against them. I am slowing changing my mind on meds. Here is why.

1) Why feel like this if you don't have too? I am tired of depression, anxiety and fear. I don't want to live like this. It has been almost 7 year of this and it has stolen so much of my life. I don't want it to steal any more of my life. I want to live, love and laugh again. If taking a pill helps me to feel like myself again, great.

2) PTSD rewires your brain. If you brain has been rewired it could take years to rewire it back the way it was if you can even do that. While your are trying taking meds help you deal with the fact you are stuck in a mind that is so different from what it once was that you know longer know who you are.

3) Meds can help you cope with the vast amount of emotions that PSTD sends your way everyday. Like fear, anxiety, anger, frustration. It can help to keep you on a more even mood, so others do not consider you a complete nut because of your wild mood swings. This in turn will help you keep your job or get one which helps in the healing process because you have something other than what caused your PTSD to thing about and you feel self worth again.

I have been on Trazodone for 2 years now for sleep. A good nights sleep allows me to cope better, feel better and face the day. I still have days. For example I have been depressed for the last 2 days. I will be seeing my doc about anti-depressants again because this feels like a deep depression I had 3 years ago. I took meds for it for a year and then got off them.

My point is, you don't have to feel bad so why would you? Meds are a personal choice for sure, but I know I did not want to take them because of the stigma attached to them. I feel I was weak if I took drugs.

all of their bad attitudes is the reason i only take otcs and when i need something more...i drink tequila or something. i have had it with medical assholes....i mean professionals.