Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Sharing an older poem as I have had a few on here ask me to keep sharing my writing. It is my way to release pent up emotions, be it frustation, sadness, anger or fear. This is a darker poem at a pretty depressing time in my life so if your easily triggered you may not want to read it. I like anyone, have my moments of light and dark, strength and weakness, and my poetry reflects this.
I share this for anyone who has suffered childhood abuse and has never really felt good enough or that they fit in anywhere. I feel your pain and I just want you to know your not alone...
" I have to leave, you know I cannot stay
from my past I need to get far away..
I am resigned and have no doubt
Sometimes the only way is out."
Plagued by memories of my bitter past
it seems my nightmares are bound to last
All I want is to be at peace..
for this relentless pain to cease.
You and I really never had a chance
for I alone with the devil dance
I know you tried more than anyone should
and I failed like I knew I would.
I've been worthless since the age of eight
I can't get past my shame and hate
I did not choose this haunted life
and tried to escape with the sting of the knife.
I cannot change what has been
All I want is to feel whole again
I look in the mirror and hate what I see
Damaged goods look back at me.
I see embarrasment in my families eyes
They pretend to care but I see through thier lies
It would not matter if I were even here
so many times I've wanted to disappear.
I have learned men bring me only pain
I have learned to love is all in vain
I have learned I will always be alone
and never have a place called home.
So to my true friends I must say goodbye
my heart is heavy but I dare not cry
to be strong is all that I have left
to tread this road without regret.
JoaniesLegacy
P.S. If I shared before, sorry. I can't recall which ones I have.
I share this for anyone who has suffered childhood abuse and has never really felt good enough or that they fit in anywhere. I feel your pain and I just want you to know your not alone...
" I have to leave, you know I cannot stay
from my past I need to get far away..
I am resigned and have no doubt
Sometimes the only way is out."
Plagued by memories of my bitter past
it seems my nightmares are bound to last
All I want is to be at peace..
for this relentless pain to cease.
You and I really never had a chance
for I alone with the devil dance
I know you tried more than anyone should
and I failed like I knew I would.
I've been worthless since the age of eight
I can't get past my shame and hate
I did not choose this haunted life
and tried to escape with the sting of the knife.
I cannot change what has been
All I want is to feel whole again
I look in the mirror and hate what I see
Damaged goods look back at me.
I see embarrasment in my families eyes
They pretend to care but I see through thier lies
It would not matter if I were even here
so many times I've wanted to disappear.
I have learned men bring me only pain
I have learned to love is all in vain
I have learned I will always be alone
and never have a place called home.
So to my true friends I must say goodbye
my heart is heavy but I dare not cry
to be strong is all that I have left
to tread this road without regret.
JoaniesLegacy
P.S. If I shared before, sorry. I can't recall which ones I have.
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My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...
I have today. I work on forgiving my abusers. both my parents were emotional abusers and my mom and alcoholic.
not so much fun growing up, plus they got divorced. My mom was NEVER happy. man after man, drink after drink. She died at 57 yrs old of cancer. I do not want to end up like that. I think of my ex as my tumor / cancer and I got it out! Now I'm recovering and loving life. Still have problems and peaks and valleys but nothing compares to what hell was w/ the ex. The past is dead!
Or turn your writing into uplifting things. problems resolving, life getting better....I think you have talent!!!!
For example where you say you" have been worthless since the age of eight", a correction might read something like...You WERE TOLD that you were worthless since the age of eight but that you are WORTHWHILE now and always have been. I don't mean for you to necessarily do this here, but maybe it would help you so the next time you get in that dark place, you can argue with your own thinking and assumptions about yourself.
Idk but for me if I write down negative thoughts about myself, it works the opposite way, by reaffirming my mistaken beliefs.
Just a thought.
That being said, I adore my neices and nephews and I fiercly protective.
I do appreciate your kind comments about my writing. I am sorry you had to endure an abusive childhood. I wish parents would work on themselves as they don't realize how abuse affects childrens young minds.