Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
I think it is very hard to try to get affirmation for my feelings from people that discount them and even their own feelings (story of my life). I know how easy it is to run from our feelings, some people for a lifetime. It has been a long road to validate and consider my own feelings. I still tend to avoid them with busy activities or preocupations (such as caretaking). I need to affirm them and assert myself.
I am here and I find activities to DISTRACT me from feeling my feelings (currently, computer), so I have to think about that.
I am nervous about waiting to hear when I will go for orientation for a new part time job.
I am mad at my off and on boyfriend for being needy when I need space (not a good combination) and trying to let this go.
If I take the time to breathe and clear my mind I actually am rather peaceful.
Thank you for asking :)
"I need to affirm them"
Its nice when someone else can validate them for you, but its not something you can wait around for or spend too much energy seeking. You sometimes just have to validate yourself. I think there is sometimes a fine line between someone validating your feelings, and someone commiserating with you. Commiseration... co-misery... the sharing of misery... well... just doesn't resonate with growth in my book. Validation in balance has value... but when we sit around just licking eachothers wounds with a 'awww... poor baby' type of sentiment, then we just keep eachother down, giving more attention to victimhood than survivorhood.
Even if no one in the world knows how you feel, or thinks your feelings are justified... it doesn't matter. ALL feelings are ok. Its what we do WITH them that sometimes ISNT ok.