What a cute website.I am not turning 70 but my parents have and I walk the
journey with them-seeing changes, but if you embrace life it means embracing
all seasons.So yeah I have had friends all ages- some people you love more
as they grow older- their wisdom and experiences are priceless.It seems as though your childhood had rough patches ( no support). Why was their no
emotional support ?

Thank you for visiting my website.! And for taking in old people like me -- not the usual response in the country. Not that I think a younger person need be generally interested in the issues that I've addressed.

PLEASE ask me the more personal questions on that site. I would love to get it going there, and I'm afraid it will fail just because there's nobody but one person posting now. Chicken and egg thing. I will answer either way, however, just let me know.

Okay sure thing will go on over to the site , hope all is well and just take it easy
my grandmother use to have a saying, She would say I aint taking life on,
Funny when you look at it this way the world then begins to cater to you.I try
to think of life as a dance- one long dance.Different seasons different dance
styles different dance speeds but all remain a dance-I have learned to laugh
at little things. I have learned to give things up, discard extra weight, all so that
I can dance and stay light on my feet. I tell you if you focus on squeezing the
every droplet of juice out of extra second minute in life and that means dropping all the not necessary in life- you start becoming lighter and suddenly you learn the art of squeezing 40 more years into your life at 70.
I have seen some of the most beautiful people and they are 70.The most intelligent people and they are 72.The most successful people at age 74.If
a person in their 20's does not know their lifespan-they are 20 and also 70.
Thanks for listening -most 70 year old dont have the patience to listen : ) : ).
Talk to you later.

Osheana, it's easy to listen to you. You have a lot to say and say it well. About not taking life on -- there's a saying in sports -- let it happen, don't try to make it happen. I'm a lifelong overachiever who is trying to get his head around the idea that you don't have to be exceptional to be worthy, to feel good about yourself. Makes sense to me, but the feeling part seems impossible. I'm hardwired to chase the horizon. After all, you only have one childhood to feel loved and wanted and accepted. Unless I'm striving towards something, I feel like I'm sinking. I don't think I am, I just feel that way. Which feels bad. So I smoke (4 months a year -- 4 on and 8 off. Amazing, smoking gives me a momentary vacation from the feelings that something is wrong. . . .

I understand how you feel... I'm not turning 70, but I have another milestone birthday coming up that is a big one for me. The thing is most people think I am 15-20 years younger and I am in an industry with a lot younger people. I have not made my age public. But yes, being alienated from family (by my own choice) plus feeling like I can't really settle with anyone i my current circles... well, let's just say.. these milestone bdays make you feel the passing of time more! I think that is all there is to it. If we just treat it like another day and stop putting so much emphasis on the milestone, perhaps we can feel better? Blessings to you!!

Maryan, interesting post. I’m finding people react different ways to milestones, however it may affect them, 1. It’s just a number, I just keep living my life. 2. Time to think about who I am, where I’m going.

I’m much more a no. 2, but imo both are valid. You seem kind of caught in between.

Bernie, you are so correct! That's a very good point too! Astounded by the wisdom in here! Whatever the case, you sound like you have learned a lot and are in a very good place! Blessings!

Thanks, Maryan. I would like lo hear more from you. It would be great if you visited, commented on our website, think it might interest you. turning70blog.com.

I liked this part --"Has age brought wisdom? I don't know." Me too, I don't know. I feel wiser. But then I always thought I knew more than I did. Now, looking back, I haven't had a good perspective of where I was until about five to ten years later. So maybe when I'm 75 or 80 I'll know if I really gained wisdom.

About the kids, every caring parent goes through that. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Again,looking back, it's clear a lot of my pain of watching my kid struggle was guilt. But then we gave him some good stuff too. As I am sure from your thoughtful message, you did.

Do you think there's been any change in your perspective about yourself and life from, say, 69 to 72?

Jeanne, thanks. I’ve been lucky to know a few amazing people, and trust me, I’m not.

About losing looks. Imo, hardly a superficial matter. More like primal, especially for women, right up there with survival instinct.

As I see it now, the big change in me around turning 70 is a real determination to live my life according to my adult perspective rather than childhood instincts. Almost all our inner injured children are emotionally crosswired. I’m trying to accept that despite my adult perspective, I feel unnecessarily despairing. Those feelings I don’t think will ever change, but I can focus on my perspective rather than those feelings. And then I feel better sometimes and not stuck. But if I’m focused on my default feelings, there are always objective realities to justify them — like aging — so it’s a downward spiral. Just like cripple who is focused on what he can’t do rather than what he can. Simple to say, hard to do.

I’m interested in exploring with you the impact of your faith upon aging. I’m an atheist. I can see we share issues but what is the impact of our different views of life ending? On the turning70blog.com, you can see a lot about a man’s struggle with diminished appeal and life ending and dealing with being crosswired. It would be great if you wanted to dialogue about those posts there. That site is a startup and won’t succeed unless it can develop a community. Please help!

Your communication with your inner child! I did it for the first time in my 60s. (I didn’t read the self help books.). I just told the little boy what he would become and have as a man. He was excited and so relieved. Whenever I did that, and when I read your post, and now, I cry.

One of my favorite sayings — Talking to myself is no problem. My problem is usually I don’t listen!

I am generally healthy, especially for 71. What you go through would terrify me.

What a fine dream! I had one about a year ago where I was in a summer camp, but troubled, anxious. Then a giant lifted me over the trees, and then I flew on my own. Then I was in a canoe paddling away from the camp in a dark swamp, being followed by a riderless canoe, which I angrily flung out of the lake.

More complicated.

Hi Bernie,
I think what Jeane talked about was so beautiful- just breathtaking- and the fact that everything in that
experience made everything look grey here.It is kind of grey.The world is not as Beautiful and Bright as
it should be.Why we would not even care about an ache or pain but you see the world we live in has a tendency to gravitate to "grey". Like I am upset that people dont see themselves as queens and kings and people that are 70 are to be considered royalty-having achieved your stripes.You feel only the way you do
because of the grey areas.You see without the grey areas like in Jeanes beautiful experience your only 70 but all is bright and beautiful and you have springs on your feet.Age and looks dont matter at all.

Yes, there are lots of colors including for many of us of a lot of grey. I like the song Turn Turn Turn. “For everything there is a season . . . .”

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=W4ga_M5Zdn4

Yes, very tricky, making sense of our world.

I think the dream is about an awakening from my childhood patterns and rising above some childhood fears.. But — the riderless canoe following me through a dark swamp, — there are problems ahead as my past will always be with me. That’s so hard to accept and live with.

Doubt I’ll ever feel done with this stuff.

Jeanne, your path is one of many, as you know. Maybe becoming the abuser is more common. Those types evidently not inclined to post here.