Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Ive been keeping something in my personal life to myself for awhile now. Early on, I wanted to know that it was something with half a chance of actually happening.
When I saw it was indeed, happening, I felt a little guilty about sharing happy news in a community with such serious challenges.
But, with the event approaching, I accept that its time to share this with you, my fellow travelers, and hope that it will stand for you, as a sign of hope, an example that relationship free of abuse is both possible and out there for the claiming.
This coming Sunday, I will re-marry.
Im not about to tell you its a perfect relationship. There are a couple issues that, one could argue, are cause for some concern. At times, he can be self-absorbed. Ive felt frustration around this and have a handful of cards. Weve had go rounds about decorating the house, television programming, and the best way to cook corn. When I cool down, I conclude that these are comparatively minor issues, and I find some resolution I can live with, though it may be my second or third choice.
But my bottom line is that Ive known him (and loved him), for a very, very long time throughout the course of my adult life. (We met in 1973.) I can say without any reservation that hes not mean, hes not unfeeling and hes not abusive. Other than those moments when hes lost to his own preferences ---- hes respectful, playful, tender, enthusiastic, intelligent (sometimes irritatingly so), and loving.
So, on Sunday, I will take vows again. Around me will be my friends. I dont have much family, but long ago, I adopted some of his. They will be there, supporting both of us.
I will have music, and look forward to dancing all evening. No out-of-town honeymoon. Just the joy of feeling connected with a companion I believe is karmically correct, and the knowledge that well be traveling together till death do us part. At this point in our lives, forever aint as long as it used to be. I just hope as many of our days as possible, leave us both smiling.
Thats the skinny Ive been keeping under my hat. Please know that, while I know that relationship doesnt fix our lives and that virtually no relationship is like the love songs we love to listen to. . . . . a working relationship with a reasonably functional partner can enhance and enrich our day-to-day. I believe that this one will do that in my life. Obviously, there are no guarantees. Just a trust in my own understanding of myself, my grasp on the workings of the psyche and the spirit, and an abiding faith that life is meant to be lived with energy and delight.
I will NOT be disappearing from this board, as I consider all here, my sisters and brothers on the journey of reclamation. I wish for all of you an experience of your existence that delivers you every satisfaction and joy youve ever imagined ----- and more.
Just wanted to share with you, this new chapter, and hope that it holds some kind of optimism that life can be far, far better than what youve experienced so far ---- and that pain is not the only intense emotion. Much love to all.
When I saw it was indeed, happening, I felt a little guilty about sharing happy news in a community with such serious challenges.
But, with the event approaching, I accept that its time to share this with you, my fellow travelers, and hope that it will stand for you, as a sign of hope, an example that relationship free of abuse is both possible and out there for the claiming.
This coming Sunday, I will re-marry.
Im not about to tell you its a perfect relationship. There are a couple issues that, one could argue, are cause for some concern. At times, he can be self-absorbed. Ive felt frustration around this and have a handful of cards. Weve had go rounds about decorating the house, television programming, and the best way to cook corn. When I cool down, I conclude that these are comparatively minor issues, and I find some resolution I can live with, though it may be my second or third choice.
But my bottom line is that Ive known him (and loved him), for a very, very long time throughout the course of my adult life. (We met in 1973.) I can say without any reservation that hes not mean, hes not unfeeling and hes not abusive. Other than those moments when hes lost to his own preferences ---- hes respectful, playful, tender, enthusiastic, intelligent (sometimes irritatingly so), and loving.
So, on Sunday, I will take vows again. Around me will be my friends. I dont have much family, but long ago, I adopted some of his. They will be there, supporting both of us.
I will have music, and look forward to dancing all evening. No out-of-town honeymoon. Just the joy of feeling connected with a companion I believe is karmically correct, and the knowledge that well be traveling together till death do us part. At this point in our lives, forever aint as long as it used to be. I just hope as many of our days as possible, leave us both smiling.
Thats the skinny Ive been keeping under my hat. Please know that, while I know that relationship doesnt fix our lives and that virtually no relationship is like the love songs we love to listen to. . . . . a working relationship with a reasonably functional partner can enhance and enrich our day-to-day. I believe that this one will do that in my life. Obviously, there are no guarantees. Just a trust in my own understanding of myself, my grasp on the workings of the psyche and the spirit, and an abiding faith that life is meant to be lived with energy and delight.
I will NOT be disappearing from this board, as I consider all here, my sisters and brothers on the journey of reclamation. I wish for all of you an experience of your existence that delivers you every satisfaction and joy youve ever imagined ----- and more.
Just wanted to share with you, this new chapter, and hope that it holds some kind of optimism that life can be far, far better than what youve experienced so far ---- and that pain is not the only intense emotion. Much love to all.
Xxxxxxx hugs xxxxxxx
And thanks for all you do here. You truly and deeply care about the well-being of those that are or have been in toxic relationships. (Note, I still have a little tiny issue with the "abuse" word.) Your support with others on here has helped ensure that my "come back" will be more healthy and complete, and hopefully not as long as it would have taken without this support. Gracious!
Cut a rug on Sunday!
LT
Very happy for you!! Congratulations!! :) :)
for all your good wishes.
Your warm thoughts mean
the world to me.
In the years I've been
on my own since I
divorced my then-abuser,
I've had mostly good times
as a single woman. I've
enjoyed being on my own.
But life is an adventure.
Sending love out all of you,
along with wishes that
every one will find
safety, peace, well-being,
satisfaction and joy.