Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
I'm really shocked that he actually contacted me. I received the following email:
**Hi Kelly, i know i should not be doing this but......anyway i really do need your help in my English,i know i asked this from you before.the truth is i might be able to get help some place else but i just don't feel like i really wanna deal with the world at this time.and if by any means at all this will put you in bad situation, then you don't worry about it (serious).**
Ha! I haven't faced the world in 3 weeks. Going to face my advisor about how badly I have managed to screw up my life today, the fact that I can't really afford to stay in school on my own, and that if I stop I'll have to start paying money back! And guess what, no one is helping me...I get to face the dilemma once again of having rent money, but nothing left, so do I pay the rent or go without food and gas in the car??
And No!!!! You should not be doing this because you know it preys on my weakness for helping other people and that it hurts me to have to say no to anyone. I will end up guilty and crying if I break the no contact and I will end up guilty and crying because I am not there saving the world for everyone!
Now that I got that out, I am going to go get ready to try to fix my life today and pray that I have the strength to make it through the day without a complete melt down or doing something stupid!
**Hi Kelly, i know i should not be doing this but......anyway i really do need your help in my English,i know i asked this from you before.the truth is i might be able to get help some place else but i just don't feel like i really wanna deal with the world at this time.and if by any means at all this will put you in bad situation, then you don't worry about it (serious).**
Ha! I haven't faced the world in 3 weeks. Going to face my advisor about how badly I have managed to screw up my life today, the fact that I can't really afford to stay in school on my own, and that if I stop I'll have to start paying money back! And guess what, no one is helping me...I get to face the dilemma once again of having rent money, but nothing left, so do I pay the rent or go without food and gas in the car??
And No!!!! You should not be doing this because you know it preys on my weakness for helping other people and that it hurts me to have to say no to anyone. I will end up guilty and crying if I break the no contact and I will end up guilty and crying because I am not there saving the world for everyone!
Now that I got that out, I am going to go get ready to try to fix my life today and pray that I have the strength to make it through the day without a complete melt down or doing something stupid!
Keep ignoring, he doesn't deserve your help. You've already given so much to this person who abused you in return. You feel badly about it because you have compassion, it's gonna happen. Do you think he feels bad for screwing you over big time? Nope.
He is trying every angle he can think of to get you to reply to him or even acknowledge him. It is not really about you helping him with this... it is about him seeing if he can get you to respond.
Stay strong.
We have to be actors to not let it get to us. The author said to use "bemused detachment".
I call it "witnessing." Just witnessing.
Even if we're not "bemused," which may be a lot to ask, if we can be detached and just witness, we have a chance of being able to manage our responses to what's going on.