I was texting with a friend (easier to hide from him than a phone call), and my friend helped me realize a very dark truth. I know I've been experiencing emotional abuse from the person who's supposed to be my best friend, but also physical as well. It never leaves bruises, and never happens when anyone else is around, so I think it will be hard to prove. I've been working the last couple days to remember as many emotional moments as I can and write them in my journal here on DS. It saddens me to see how many there are. My biggest issue is in wanting to leave, I have a major roadblock, my health. I have a condition called Ulcerative Colitis, which for most of the time leaves me totally dependent on his income and insurance. Heck, for 4 months earlier this year I was totally housebound due to a really bad flare.

What I'm hoping is that I can find help here, not only in getting myself together emotionally, but perhaps pointed in the direction of programs or groups that can help me get myself on track financially as well. I truly look forward to the day I can tell him to take a hike.