im new to this but I'd say yes he's doing it on purpose and don't contact him. Sounds like control to me.

My abuser is fighting a misdemeanor theft charge. If he loses he goes to jail. If he takes the plea he gets probation. He's doing it on purpose to keep himself in my life and because he thrives on the drama so he's willing to risk going to jail. (His own downfall)

I think more information. Is this your husband or boyfriend? Are there children involved? What deed does he need to sign?

My bf and I own the house. I paid for it and stupidly put him on the deed. No kids

If you have a protective order against him, please, please don't drop it! That's what he wants. To string you along, to keep him in your thoughts.

Have you contacted a lawyer? You can got to AVVO.com and get free legal advice there. So, so helpful. Yes, it is definitely about control. With an abuser, it always is!

I've posted this a few times....I have a lawyer...he drew a contract up that he signs the deed if I drop it. If I don't drop it I lose $100,000 in the equity I put into this house. He's blackmailing me. So I agreed....and now no response. He will lose his job if the order gets out. So I can't understand why he isn't signing.

Need opinion on why when he has so much to lose.

Why would a lawyer draw up a contract that doesn't protect the interests of the client??? Dropping a protective order is NOT in your best interest. I think you need another lawyer.

As far as your bf....yep... control! If he was of rational mind he wouldn't be an abuser.

Just because he signs it doesn't mean he'll leave you alone.

It is NOT your responsibility if he loses his job. That is ON HIM ONLY.

You having an order of protection is because he is DANGEROUS! If you drop it and he comes after you again, you will be in DANGER and the courts may NOT BELIEVE YOU BECAUSE YOU DROPPED THE ORDER!!!!

Please don't drop it. Is any money worth your life, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually?

Blackmail is illegal.

If it were me, I would go to more lawyers and get 2nd, 3rd and 4th opinions as to what my legal options are. Many lawyers offer free consultations.

Please don't give up or give in!!! There has to be a way to outsmart the abuser and you just need to find the right attorney!

I spoke to four top attorneys....they all tell me the same I have to drop it and then I can sell my home and move to another state which is what I am planning.

I went to AVVO.com and saw this posted in respect to deeds....

"In a partition suit the parties relative contributions to the property are calculated, then each party has an opportunity to buy out the other's interest, if there is no buy out, the property will be sold at auction and the profit or debt will be allocated based on the relative contributions. It is not a lawsuit to contemplate prosecuting without a lawyer."

Sounds like to me if bf made no contribution to the property, in a "partition suit", he won't gain anything if you sell the property. Not sure if it's the same nationwide, but that was a response for GA.

JBradsen.....very true and very very costly. Its a Supreme court which can take up to two years....and $10-20,000 in my State. Trying to avoid this

How about renting out the house and moving to another state?

MyTrueColors, totally agree with you! Blackmail is illegal. If he loses his job & goes to jail, how would that affect your property rights in needing to sell? Inmates can't fight very well from their cells. You have ALL the power right now. Do not let it go!

Thanks its not an option right now....its my only option as listed. I really only wanted an option on why you feel he isn't signing...Control? Even at his own expense. Simple question.

Yes. Control. He abused you mentally while being with you and he has not changed.
He counts on you to act on your emotion, but you can choose how you feel and how you respond because now you know he is an abuser and not willing to be his supply anymore.

He is an abusive amoral scumbag criminal. There is no telling why they do what they do. Two good reasons are control and making people suffer.

Please do everything you can to stay SAFE. Whatever you do, do not have any in person contact with him.

If he signs the contract and comes after you, was it worth it? How long is a protective order anyway? Can you put a time limit on when you remove the order... like he signs now and you drop the order after 2 years. Please, be safe. That's your priority. No amount of money is worth the actions of an abuser.