Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Sometimes I get so ticked at my therapist. I had an appointment yesterday. I was so excited to be able to tell her about the ex trying to push my buttons and not getting anywhere with it.
http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/6845086-wonderful-cathartic-experience
When I mentioned that I couldn't get my ex to come get her things or talk about doing it she said, "That's part of the Borderline issues, they can't make a commitment, even for something so simple as that." Why couldn't she (therapist) have left well enough alone?
So now I'm feeling just a little bit sorry for the ex again. I never did hate her for what she did to me because I know she's sick. But Tuesday night had been such a wonderful experience and now it's not quite the same.
http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/6845086-wonderful-cathartic-experience
When I mentioned that I couldn't get my ex to come get her things or talk about doing it she said, "That's part of the Borderline issues, they can't make a commitment, even for something so simple as that." Why couldn't she (therapist) have left well enough alone?
So now I'm feeling just a little bit sorry for the ex again. I never did hate her for what she did to me because I know she's sick. But Tuesday night had been such a wonderful experience and now it's not quite the same.
I'm happy for your progress.
I agree that I suspect your therapist was intending to share information that would expand your insight, not devalue your progress.
I understand how you feel down a peg. I suggest that if it suits you, just flush the info you got, and go back to feeling proud of your progress. You're entitled. Good for you.
Later on, sometime, you can return and pick up that piece of insight, to tuck it away in the memory banks.
I'm actually glad you shared it with us. Just yesterday, I was talking with someone who absolutely hasn't been able to commitment to ANYTHING and has never kept our few appointments, on the phone or in person ---- on time. So my appreciation to YOU for posting what your therapist said. On your end, just be proud of yourself.
And be well.
Ilene
Sometimes they're going to shoot straight from the hip, that can hurt. It's to help you understand why things happen, and break it down for you so you can see the real issue. My therapist has said a couple of things that were hard to hear too, but it's all in the name of truly trying to help us heal.
I feel badly sometimes for my ex-narc being a victim of his environment too, and he's upset that I'm ignoring him. It's like tough love...I do still care, but from a very very FAR distance.
I used to feel sorry for my ex ... it's why I stayed far longer than I should have.
But, really, how much effort does it take to go get your things? Next thing she'll be mad if you get rid of them. That's classic behavior my X did with someone he dated before we met.