Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group

Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.

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I recorded my emotional abuse

cloudiness
cloudiness

I have recordings of my mother screaming at me on my cellphone. I do this because when I was younger she pushed me to attempt suicide. I survived but kept my attempt secret. Her words have sent me into suicidal crisis multiple times and I initially recorded her outbursts to review them when I’m in a better place mentally. But whenever I listen to them I break down. I decided to keep them though to show to a professional one day if I ever get to. 


She pushed me into suicidal crisis again over the weekend and I almost attempted. I tried making a noose in my room but I made no use of it. I reached out for support luckily and decided I would at least put it off. 


I fell ill the next day which literally made it impossible to kill myself because I had no strength. 


I went to school the next day and told my counselor what happened and that I recorded my mother. And she asked to hear it so I let her listen to it. She told me that what my mother did to me was indeed mental/emotionally abusive. 


And it was kind of like taking a long awaited breath of fresh air. I don’t know hearing an adult with kids of her own confirm that this abuse wasn’t just in my head was comforting. 

maryjan
maryjan
Good for you! So proud of you that you told someone! How I wish I would have done that when I was younger! It took me many years and after she has damaged me many times to finally cut contact with her! It never got any better with her despite me moving far away from her. She would still use every opportunity given to her to mess me around! Good for you!! Maybe you can ask your counsellor if you can keep coming to her? Validation is a very good thing indeed!!

In my case, my mental health was also an issue and I decided that no contact with my mother was necessary. I had no choice really! Your mom is making you feel helpless and powerless! That is not what a parent is supposed to do! I wish you all the best!! Keep coming here too! It helps a lot!
HopeinGod1
HopeinGod1
My goodness C, this is a terrible situation! My heart grieves for you. No one should be treated like this!As someone else has posted, I am also very glad that you talked to your counselor and my hope is that you continue to seek her help in getting help for yourself. Counselors have lots of experience in these types of situations and perhaps she can offer a safe place for you as well as counseling specific to emotional abuse. Perhaps a safe place can give you time to feel safe as well as talk to a professional in these situations. Also, if you attend church or you have a friend that goes to church, seek help from the pastor. There are a lot of people out there willing to help you.In the meantime, please, please don’t hurt yourself because you are special young lady and your mom’s behavior is not right. I will be praying that your mom’s behavior changes dramatically and that she be a loving mom. And I pray that soon you will look at all this and thank the Lord you are alive and healing. Healing will happen and I know it will because I forgave my dad years ago for the emotional abuse he created in our family. Be an overcomer because you can overcome this situation!
ooooo
ooooo
Wow, that is awful treatment. No one should be treated that way and it's great to hear you found validation and help!

I used to record my ex. I'm not even sure why I started...the abuse felt so invisible and I suppose I wanted to capture it so I could know it was real or study it or something. Anyways, they proved useful later during divorce. Keep your recordings safe and secret in case you need them one day.

Stay safe, seek help, focus on you, and remember that abusers abuse and it has nothing to do with you. It's all them.
JustJenny
JustJenny
Cloudiness so sorry your going through this, I hope you can pull through.

ooooo I am curious how your recordings helped you later in a divorce situation? I am going through similar issues with my husband and while its impossible to record every instance, i have recorded a several outbursts and am curious it it may help me in the future during a divorce/custody battle?