Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
For those of you who don't know, I recently wrote a discussion about how I got "duped".
In a thick nutshell, I am healing from a physically and mentally abusive relationship. I left her before for a year and a half and she sucked me back in to help her "do her dirty." And way more recently, I shared a storage space with her and she wouldn't give me back the key, so I went to storage a few days ago to find my dvd player and my vcr missing. She didn't get what she wanted from me so she thought that she could just TAKE ANYTHING SHE WANTS FROM ME!
To put things on top of that, her psychotic boyfriend of present is the only way that I have contact with her. I wanted to call the police, but she has a lot of time on the shelf( meaning she's pretty much on the run from the police). So I sent him a text telling him to tell her to give me back my things and he blew up on me saying he was going to beat my ass. I told him to go ahead, pretty much daring him to do it and see what happens to him. I know that I shouldn't have enticed him and it took everything in me to NOT stoop to his level and speed dial my boys.
I don't ever talk about this portion of my life, so to be extremely vague, I know a group of guys that are practically family to me that have a lot of experience in these matters, and when problems like this arise, they handle it. But I decided not to because then that would just start a huge war between both groups of these people, and violence only leads to more violence.
I have contemplated turning her in, but I realize that that is not my job to do that and she will pay the consequences sooner or later.I am just so angry with myself that I have wasted this much time being blinded and drinking until oblivion because in some warped section of my mind, I thought that she would actually be with me and things would be ok.
Another thing that scared me was the connection that we had together. I know that people connect and are on the same level all of the time, but at one point it was like we had the same brain. We said the same things at the same time, and felt the same things a lot at the same time. Even in a sexual aspect we reached the "climax" lol at the same time.
But I think I realize why that happened so much. The reason why it happened is because she practically brainwashed me into thinking that everything that SHE wanted was everything that I wanted, and I think that's how a lot of abusive people do that.
I don't know why she was brought into my life, or why I went through this again and again, but if anything that I am saying is helping anyone then I would feel better about going through all of this.
On a positive end, I have been reading every day and playing my guitar and posting my crazy good covers on the internet, and I have never felt freer. I am obviously still angry over this situation and what she took from me, but I still have my music, what is left of my family, what is left of my friends, and I am very VERY grateful for that. If anyone out there is going through the same thing, there is NOTHING that you cannot jump back from. It doesn't matter how old you are or how many times you have gone back to the same situation, we ALL deserve to be happy, healthy, and prosperous in some way. I thought that I found it with her, but wanting to save someone that CANNOT be saved is not living healthy and prosperous. I thought that I could help her, and I ended up living my life FOR her. Don't stay in a horrible relationship because you are scared to be alone, I cannot stress that enough because it is something that I am learning right now too. In my 26 years of life I have gone through everything from being repeatedly raped to attending over 30 funerals, (including my fiance) to homelessness and what seemed like a bottomless pit of drugs and alcohol, and I am still here! And I am going to make the most of it.
Also I want to thank those who commented on my duped topic, I read all of them, and they all helped me in some way.
Obviously I'm still pissed so I will probably post another discussion on what's going on, but one thing is for sure that I am not going back this time. EVER.
Thanks again for giving me hope guys. So much love and, of course,
xoxoxo
Holly D.
In a thick nutshell, I am healing from a physically and mentally abusive relationship. I left her before for a year and a half and she sucked me back in to help her "do her dirty." And way more recently, I shared a storage space with her and she wouldn't give me back the key, so I went to storage a few days ago to find my dvd player and my vcr missing. She didn't get what she wanted from me so she thought that she could just TAKE ANYTHING SHE WANTS FROM ME!
To put things on top of that, her psychotic boyfriend of present is the only way that I have contact with her. I wanted to call the police, but she has a lot of time on the shelf( meaning she's pretty much on the run from the police). So I sent him a text telling him to tell her to give me back my things and he blew up on me saying he was going to beat my ass. I told him to go ahead, pretty much daring him to do it and see what happens to him. I know that I shouldn't have enticed him and it took everything in me to NOT stoop to his level and speed dial my boys.
I don't ever talk about this portion of my life, so to be extremely vague, I know a group of guys that are practically family to me that have a lot of experience in these matters, and when problems like this arise, they handle it. But I decided not to because then that would just start a huge war between both groups of these people, and violence only leads to more violence.
I have contemplated turning her in, but I realize that that is not my job to do that and she will pay the consequences sooner or later.I am just so angry with myself that I have wasted this much time being blinded and drinking until oblivion because in some warped section of my mind, I thought that she would actually be with me and things would be ok.
Another thing that scared me was the connection that we had together. I know that people connect and are on the same level all of the time, but at one point it was like we had the same brain. We said the same things at the same time, and felt the same things a lot at the same time. Even in a sexual aspect we reached the "climax" lol at the same time.
But I think I realize why that happened so much. The reason why it happened is because she practically brainwashed me into thinking that everything that SHE wanted was everything that I wanted, and I think that's how a lot of abusive people do that.
I don't know why she was brought into my life, or why I went through this again and again, but if anything that I am saying is helping anyone then I would feel better about going through all of this.
On a positive end, I have been reading every day and playing my guitar and posting my crazy good covers on the internet, and I have never felt freer. I am obviously still angry over this situation and what she took from me, but I still have my music, what is left of my family, what is left of my friends, and I am very VERY grateful for that. If anyone out there is going through the same thing, there is NOTHING that you cannot jump back from. It doesn't matter how old you are or how many times you have gone back to the same situation, we ALL deserve to be happy, healthy, and prosperous in some way. I thought that I found it with her, but wanting to save someone that CANNOT be saved is not living healthy and prosperous. I thought that I could help her, and I ended up living my life FOR her. Don't stay in a horrible relationship because you are scared to be alone, I cannot stress that enough because it is something that I am learning right now too. In my 26 years of life I have gone through everything from being repeatedly raped to attending over 30 funerals, (including my fiance) to homelessness and what seemed like a bottomless pit of drugs and alcohol, and I am still here! And I am going to make the most of it.
Also I want to thank those who commented on my duped topic, I read all of them, and they all helped me in some way.
Obviously I'm still pissed so I will probably post another discussion on what's going on, but one thing is for sure that I am not going back this time. EVER.
Thanks again for giving me hope guys. So much love and, of course,
xoxoxo
Holly D.
beansprout
Glad you have made the decision to stay away. Not you need to start taking care of yourself, so that you can heal and move on, safely and happily
deleted_user
Do not have anything to do with you ex. No phone calls, no visits, period. Y ou need to work on yourself, and find better types of people for you to be friends with, and be in relationships with, male or female.
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