Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group

Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.

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Flost 03/19/2019

I am alone for the first time in my life and have no idea who I am any more. The only thing I am finding through research, if that many abused women (and men) become habitual liars as a means of survival. Could that be true? And if it is, how do we break the cycle? I am also finding that all abuse does not leave bruises - although I have been there too.

So how do I find out who I am and how do you determine who you can and can't trust? And is it safer to just become a hermit and never have to take the chance that a new friend may end up being someone that can really hurt you?

Sungoddess671 03/20/2019

I have been feeling this so hardcore. I have been watching lots of YouTube videos to get insights.

sunandbutterflies 03/21/2019

So sorry for the loneliness that you feel and what you have experienced. It is true, not all abuse leaves bruises. For me, sometimes I wished that it did so that people could see and believe how much I was being wounded. It seemed to me at the time that the hurt I felt inside would take much longer to heal than internal wounds. If you are curious on exploring abuse and ways to heal Mending the Soul might be a good place to start.
To help me determine who I could and couldn't trust, I sought counseling, did quite a bit of prayer journaling, and spent time getting to know people before I let them in. I would recommend the books Safe People and Boundaries (Dr. Henry Cloud) to help you sort through who you can trust. Let me know if you would like additional resources or if you need help finding a counselor.

SunshineX3 03/22/2019

I know how you are feeling, I too am experiencing the same questions and concerns. I am just realizing I am with someone whom I believe has all the signs of an emotional abuser.

Strength, and peace I pray for you.

Flost 03/23/2019

Thank you so much for your comments on my post. It makes me feel better to know I am not alone.

Alone 03/28/2019

You aren’t. I left an abusive alcoholic after 12 years of marriage almost a year ago. I don’t want him back, but it’s a confusing, lonely, sad time.

maryjan 03/29/2019

Sometimes it's good to become a hermit and concentrate on yourself! This doesn't mean it has to stay that way! The more you take care of yourself, the less likely you are going to put up with someone who treats you badly! i used to do it. I no longer am able to do that! My standards have become a lot higher., and i don't mean higher in the sense that... people have to treat me like some princess all the time. I mean higher in that when I get a sense of some of that old behaviour that is hurtful, i do not stick around! You also can learn in therapy and especially specialist therapy that centres on abuse - about all the red flag behaviours and how to avoid getting sucked back into a situation with the wrong person! A lot of it is really obvious. They all have the same play book! I hope you feel better soon. I am going to post a story of healing now; i hope you will read it. Blessings!

timoA 04/16/2019

Well, strictly in terms.of being a hermit, I'd only recommend it in short bursts. Why? The obvious easy answer for me is experience (I've actually lived a hermetic life for 14yrs. Celibate and single for 34 yrs). %95 of people should only be short term hermits because it's not healthy to be alone the majority of the time (I know, ironic to hear this from a hermit but then again, I belong to the %5). Only take enough time to recharge your batteries/rest/refocus/etc. When you feel ready, Why I'm a more permanent hermit is a different story btw.

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