Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
well tonight he has his x-mas party. Do u know he still wanted me to go with him?
I was like ummm .. no thank u..
I dont know if I wrote down in another post or not... but my office x-mas party was last weekend... well I went alone.. cause I didnt want him with me.. first off becasue he is already so jealous of the guys I work with.. great bunch of guys all married.. (well really the guy would be jealous of a 90 year old who would wink at me) :) 2nd.. I didnt want him following me around all night.. and 3... hmm well I just didnt want to have to deal with him.. and I wanted to have fun.. that night.. sooooo 4.... the guys at work.. well a couple of them know whats going on and ... sooooo do not like him... them seeing the shit that they have to see day and night after night..arresting shit bags like him every night.. they just want to protect me and keep me safe... and well they just cant... I have to finally stand on my two feet and start standing up for myself. (they do tell me though, when and if we part ways... that he is free game, which I guess is and isnt good news).. I mean... maybe it would finally be enough to make the guy want to get help for his ways and see that he has a problem.. getting thrown in jail. would be a little embarrassing to me.. since I work there.. but I could deal. 5... I got blamed last year ..when we left the x-mas party that I was having a affair with one the Investigators who I talked to maybe 10 min TOTAL all night (I mean shit.. dont get me wrong ladies the MAN is fine :) HA.. but is also married and .. him and his wife were wearing MATCHING sweaters that night.. I mean shit if that doesnt TELL U right there that that man is love I dont know what will :) HA god.. i am kind of funny tonight.. but shit really? give me a break.. wth would I want to add another guy to my life.. when I cant handle the jackass I am married to? jesus now that is INSANENESS
Well.. he is gone... at his company x mas party.. so I get a stress free NIGHT who hooo.. until he decides to come home that is... probably drunk and wanting a little WHICH he is SOOOOOO not getting... I havent slept with him since Oct.....I just cant.. I am emotionally just not "there" with him.. and for me.. to not feel like a "plaything" I need to feel something u know? Just because he is my husbdna doesnt mean he has teh rights to my body (believe ME he IS NOT HAPPY about this decision...My GOD.. you would think his "thing" is gonna fall off :) HA the way he acts when I tell him no) He isnt very happy about that..
but I dont want to be his pretty doll on display tonight for all of his friends.
u should see this summer... when he would call me during work and when he was gone... , how he would talk to me in front of all his guys he works with.... like I am a sex toy, a plaything... seriously.. like rude talking to me in front of them.. sexually...
and I know if I go... thats what it will be.. is me on display for him to show off to his friends.. and I just cant handle that right now..
I cant handle.. him leaving me to sit in the corner....cant handle having to be pasted to his side all night.. silently.. not talking because I dont know anyone, and just listening to his stupid talk.
It makes me sad that ... thats all I am ... I have soo much more inside to offer someone... I am not just a pretty gal with nothing upstairs u know... and given half the chance I could and would prove that to someone.
So either he will come home tonight and go right to the couch .. which will be a relief.. or he will come home and try to get a little.... until then I guess I will be on pins and needles...
I was like ummm .. no thank u..
I dont know if I wrote down in another post or not... but my office x-mas party was last weekend... well I went alone.. cause I didnt want him with me.. first off becasue he is already so jealous of the guys I work with.. great bunch of guys all married.. (well really the guy would be jealous of a 90 year old who would wink at me) :) 2nd.. I didnt want him following me around all night.. and 3... hmm well I just didnt want to have to deal with him.. and I wanted to have fun.. that night.. sooooo 4.... the guys at work.. well a couple of them know whats going on and ... sooooo do not like him... them seeing the shit that they have to see day and night after night..arresting shit bags like him every night.. they just want to protect me and keep me safe... and well they just cant... I have to finally stand on my two feet and start standing up for myself. (they do tell me though, when and if we part ways... that he is free game, which I guess is and isnt good news).. I mean... maybe it would finally be enough to make the guy want to get help for his ways and see that he has a problem.. getting thrown in jail. would be a little embarrassing to me.. since I work there.. but I could deal. 5... I got blamed last year ..when we left the x-mas party that I was having a affair with one the Investigators who I talked to maybe 10 min TOTAL all night (I mean shit.. dont get me wrong ladies the MAN is fine :) HA.. but is also married and .. him and his wife were wearing MATCHING sweaters that night.. I mean shit if that doesnt TELL U right there that that man is love I dont know what will :) HA god.. i am kind of funny tonight.. but shit really? give me a break.. wth would I want to add another guy to my life.. when I cant handle the jackass I am married to? jesus now that is INSANENESS
Well.. he is gone... at his company x mas party.. so I get a stress free NIGHT who hooo.. until he decides to come home that is... probably drunk and wanting a little WHICH he is SOOOOOO not getting... I havent slept with him since Oct.....I just cant.. I am emotionally just not "there" with him.. and for me.. to not feel like a "plaything" I need to feel something u know? Just because he is my husbdna doesnt mean he has teh rights to my body (believe ME he IS NOT HAPPY about this decision...My GOD.. you would think his "thing" is gonna fall off :) HA the way he acts when I tell him no) He isnt very happy about that..
but I dont want to be his pretty doll on display tonight for all of his friends.
u should see this summer... when he would call me during work and when he was gone... , how he would talk to me in front of all his guys he works with.... like I am a sex toy, a plaything... seriously.. like rude talking to me in front of them.. sexually...
and I know if I go... thats what it will be.. is me on display for him to show off to his friends.. and I just cant handle that right now..
I cant handle.. him leaving me to sit in the corner....cant handle having to be pasted to his side all night.. silently.. not talking because I dont know anyone, and just listening to his stupid talk.
It makes me sad that ... thats all I am ... I have soo much more inside to offer someone... I am not just a pretty gal with nothing upstairs u know... and given half the chance I could and would prove that to someone.
So either he will come home tonight and go right to the couch .. which will be a relief.. or he will come home and try to get a little.... until then I guess I will be on pins and needles...
Hugs!