Pet Bereavement Support Group

The loss of a pet or animal to which one has become emotionally bonded can be an intense loss, comparable with the death of a loved one. Whilst there is strong evidence that animals can feel such loss for other animals, this community focuses on human feelings, when an animal is lost, dies or otherwise is departed.

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alimac2009 07/23/2008

First I would like to say, when I was four I developed arthritis. Right after that my mom got a dog from a friend that couldn't have her anymore. Tina was her name, and she knew once she met me, that there was something wrong, so she slept with me everynight and when I was sick she would wake my parents and take them to my room. She got really old, and she developed arthritis, and she got so bad to the point where whenever she woke in the morning to the time we went to bed she was crying. My mom could see in her eyes that she wanted out, so she did the noble thing and had her put to sleep. But we were still very upset about it, since the only way they will do it here for free is putting the dog in a gas chamber and gasing them. I cannot remember anything from my childhood that doesnt have her in it.

Next is my dog I raised from a puppy. I got him when I still had Tina. His name was bear and I was there for him all the time, and whenever I was upset he was there for me. Here is the problem, last year my mom and brother said that he bit them. And they got persistant enough to it that I had to give him up to the authorities. Im still suffering over that.

We have had several little puppies that have died over the years, which has also affected me greatly. But now we have five dogs in our house, and two of them are mine. Mom keeps threatening me that she is going to get rid of them if I dont do what she says. I was there for their birth!!! They sleep in my bed with me every night!!! She cant do this to me!! Even after all I have already gone through....I dont think she means it since she already thinks I dont care about anyone but myself....Im tired of people saying that, especially when it comes to my pets which I wouuld rather call my kids or siblings. (Im 16 by the way) Thanx for letting me vent...if you have anything to say plz respond, I dont want my post to be forgotten....

feisty 07/24/2008

Oh Sweetie, why does your Mom say that? Have you sat down and talked to her calmly about how much it hurts you when she threatens you to take your pets away?

I understand about how much we need our animals when we're ill. I have MS and my dogs, (Jimmy, my pug I just lost, and Artie, my Pug who's a year and a half) are so in tune with me that I don't know how I would cope without them.

Artie, without ever being trained, knows when I'm going to have a seizure. He sleeps curled around my head every night now. Tough now that he's 35 pounds..LOL.

Do you have sisters and brothers that can help you talk to your Mom, or your Dad? There is no reason you should go through any needless pain, especially when you have gone through so much already. xoxo Jen

leileismom 07/26/2008

This sounds like nothing more than an attempt at a "pity party". You are a minor, still living at home, so of course your mom makes all the rules and decisions. It sounds like the previous pets at your house haven't been treated with the utmost respect ( gas chambers, early deaths of puppies, poor care, biting family members, etc). These don't sound like ideal conditions for ANY ANIMAL to live in or under. Your best bet is to stop trying to win peoples sympathy ( you stated in your first sentence that you had arthritis), this has nothing to do with whether or not your pets are properly cared for, or not. Perhaps one day when you move out on your own you will have better success at pet ownership than your family has. Hopefully you will have learned from their mistakes and you won't take living creatures for granted, as they seem to have. Be sure to spay or neuter, give them proper and consistent vet care and love them unconditionally. Until then you don't have much choice except to try and understand your mom's point of view, since she is the responsible adult. You also should stop feeling so sorry for yourself ( and stop expecting us to) and start feeling more sympathy with what these poor pets of yours seem to go through.

alimac2009 07/26/2008

listen up you, this has nothing to do with pity, ok i mentioned my arthritis because i wanted to make a point of how close this dog grew to me, she took care of me and she alerted my parents when i was sick, it has everything to do with her. Second we take better care of our animals than we do ourselves, at the end of the month we have no food but our dogs have two fifety pound bags. No, the deaths of the puppies (said by vets) were due to the early care of the puppies by the mother dog, which by the way were not ours unless u r talking about the ones that our dogs did give birth to which by the way r still alive, well, and pretty damn happy. If there is anything in the world i hate more than people telling me We dont take care of our animals than I deserve to die now....our pets are treated better than anyone else's out here where we live...u just ruined my day, probably my whole week now, i cannot believe u have the balls to tell me that I expect pity from you, I dont have anyones pity and i dont need it, i dont feel sorry for myself i feel sorry for you because you have no idea what your talking about...

alimac2009 07/26/2008

the ONLY reason why I posted this was because I just found out about this group and this was how I figured I would introduce myself and why I am in this group, NOT for the frikin PITY!!!!!!

alimac2009 07/26/2008

The reason my dog bit them was because my brother liked to yell and hit him. Gas chamber is the way they put dogs to sleep out here so i dont know why u brought that up as a problem. We brought her to the pound, the only free place to put animals to sleep, my mom told me that that is what they did. Did u notice that right below these little boxes you use to write replies it says "in adding this comment, I 'ur name' do promise to be nice"? did u notice that? I dont think you did, because if so then you wouldnt have hit add...

feisty 07/27/2008

I'm not sure what's going on here, but I feel that when someone asks for help. we shouldn't berate or make them feel badly for it. Am I missing something? This is a support group, right?

deleted_user 07/27/2008

I agree this is a support group. A 16 year old that is having a lot of loss in her life does not need to be reprimanded about they way the dogs are taken care of. What concerns me is ... why would the Mother threaten to take the two dogs away. That is very bothersome to me. It sounds like that is the one thing that is making you feel good and happy. I did not feel like you were having a pity party just because you said you had arthritis. I feel you telling us how the dog took care of you. Hang in there. Everything will be okay.

deleted_user 07/27/2008

It really makes me sick that your mother would threaten that. In my childhood my father did that twice. He forced my mother to box up our cats and grab our dogs and take them to the pound. It was horrible to come home from school and hear of their fate. It sounds like you have some pretty insensitive people in your household. Don't ever let go of your sensitivity. Any possibility that if you explain to her how much that hurts that being also a dog owner that she would listen? I hope so! Hang in there! Hugs!!

alimac2009 07/27/2008

im srry for those who havent read the reply post on here that apparantly was deleted before my replies i posted. Just to catch you up to that one if u didnt catch it, someone was yelling at me telling me that i posted this for a pity party and she wasnt fallin for it. Thank you very much for those who believe me when i say i just wanted to introduce my situation to the group and see what others think. I talked to my mom and told her how i felt when she threatened to take my puppies away, and she says she's sorry and she understands so im so happy she wont be doing that anymore. I had cat problems too in the past, i just posted this one about my dogs. I had black cats before, and i got really attached, but it seems like somthing always happens to them. My first one ran away (moms allergic, kept them outside) and the second one got hit by a car, someone coming into our driveway, said he didnt see him with all the snow. I had one that had babies but tore up my room, and the babies, mom had to take to the pound, i dont remember why. i miss my cats, but im spending time with my puppies for now, until i move out. Thank you for your input, i really appreciate it.

alimac2009 07/27/2008

wow, im hating this, most of the posts r my own..lol. i just wanted to say im uploading some pics of my babies on here so if u want to check them out.

alimac2009 07/27/2008

i feel stupid now too...i dont know exactly if the message was deleted, or if i just am the only one not allowed to see it since i clicked ignore user....

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