Pet Bereavement Support Group
The loss of a pet or animal to which one has become emotionally bonded can be an intense loss, comparable with the death of a loved one. Whilst there is strong evidence that animals can feel such loss for other animals, this community focuses on human feelings, when an animal is lost, dies or otherwise is departed.
In 1987 my g/f and I got a german shepard mix puppy for her kids. When I was a child I never had a dog that lived more than a couple years, something always happened to them, hit by a car, ate mole poison, shot by a mean-spirited neighbor for "trespassing" or what have you. Since the kids only knew one grandparent and weren't especially close to her I thought losing a pet might help them learn about grief - not that I wanted the dog to die, it was just my experience that that's what happens to pets.
We broke up in 1998 and by that time two of the kids were out of the house anyway. I got the dog and when I had to have him put down in 2003 I was the only one to cry.
Two weeks ago my current lady and I went to a trader's fair and set up a table to sell some things. She left to get coffee and came back with a "free" 6 week old black lab mix for her but I've had him with me this past week.
It has brought back a lot of memories and sometimes I want to call him by my old dog's name. Last night I had to leave him for a few hours and as I pulled away in the car the sadness of losing my old friend came flooding back. It's more than high time to bury his cremains but I feel a little guilty about "replacing" him.
I'm not sure what the point to posting this is exactly but thanks for letting me vent.
We broke up in 1998 and by that time two of the kids were out of the house anyway. I got the dog and when I had to have him put down in 2003 I was the only one to cry.
Two weeks ago my current lady and I went to a trader's fair and set up a table to sell some things. She left to get coffee and came back with a "free" 6 week old black lab mix for her but I've had him with me this past week.
It has brought back a lot of memories and sometimes I want to call him by my old dog's name. Last night I had to leave him for a few hours and as I pulled away in the car the sadness of losing my old friend came flooding back. It's more than high time to bury his cremains but I feel a little guilty about "replacing" him.
I'm not sure what the point to posting this is exactly but thanks for letting me vent.
It's normal to have mixed feelings about a new pet coming into your life, and more difficult not to make comparisons. But, as long as you have love to give that's all that matters. Your feelings of loss will always be there and I don't think it's unusual at all to feel guilt for "replacing" your old buddy.I might get some flack for saying this, but some pets are just pets(which doesn't mean we don't love them)and some pets are more like soulmates. Although we love and care for all of them, if we are lucky sometimes they are just so much more. Give him a chance to love you, and in turn,open your heart to him-- that's the fair and loving thing to do.I hope that helps. By the way, I have the remains of 2 pets and I don't know if I will ever bury them...call me crazy :) take care--
P.S. Above all, HAVE FUN with the new puppy--they are so happy & joyous-all they want to do is please you!! :)