Personality Disorders Support Group
Personality disorders form a class of mental disorders that are characterized by long-lasting rigid patterns of thought and behaviour. Personality disorders are seen by the American Psychiatric Association as an enduring pattern of inner experience and behavior that deviates markedly from the expectations of the culture of the individual who exhibits it.
I hate what I am. Sometimes I don't know if what I feel is right or wrong. How do I know if it is my bp and I am just overreacting or if I am justified in how I feel. I am angry and hurt right now. I want to throw it all away but I know that is my bp. How do I find a solution to how I feel if I can't determine if it's ok to feel this way. How do I make it ok in my head. What if it's real then what do I do? I really want to lash out and hurt people. Not physically. No I want them to feel the way I do. I want to crush them and make them feel as insignificant as I do. I don't care if it causes me the relationship. But I know all these feelings are my bp.
Help me someone. Please talk me down.
Help me someone. Please talk me down.
Look at the list of Cognitive Distortions and without judging yourself, write down the ones you think are part of your thinking right now.
http://healthymind.com/s-distortions.html
I think we are such hypersensitive people that we often pick up on things other people don't. We can be quite intuitive, so we're not always wrong....we just often way overreact and blow things out of proportion. But we may be sensing something very real that others are oblivious to.
Let me know if reviewing the distortions then trying to reframe how you're thinking about a situation helps at all. It does me, though sometimes far more than others. And this might sound stupid, and it might not work for you but it's worth trying. Take a deep breath then hold it for anywhere form 5 to 10 seconds. Then breathe normally for a few breaths and repeat. Do this a few times. Sometimes it can help break out of that panic response your thoughts caused in your sympathetic nervous system. You can always try exercising really hard to help burn up the excess stress hormones that got released, but at some point you're going to have to reframe your thoughts as they'll only cause it to happen again. Remember to choose your battles. Getting worked up over something you flat cannot change is a waste of energy. And we cannot change other people, but we can change how we respond to them.
Take a look at this site, too.
http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/
Ok, now be honest with me. Does my advice help anything, or do I make things worse? Don't worry about hurting my feelings. I want to know, so I can back off if I need to.
* BIG HUG! *
Lisa
P.S. You already took a positive step in reaching out for help and writing about your anger rather than reacting to it. Good job! And we all know what it's like to wish others could feel our pain, so they'd understand and just maybe have some damned mercy.
http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/
1) Write down what you are feeling. Put words to your emotions and feelings.
Then 2) Write down actual facts. What is happening. Don't include your emotions in this.
It will help you determine whether your feelings are justifiable or not. In addition, it will help you determine your thought process. So if you do this often, and you recognize what your thought pattern is, you will learn to stop yourself when those unwanted or unjustifiable feelings creep up.
On a personal note, I know exactly how you're feeling. Everyone tells us what we're feeling is not real or unreasonable. But the emotions are so intense for us, how could they not be real? I also know that when you are feeling soo down and soo hurt, I know it can feel useless to try help ourselves. But do trust that things CAN turn around.
And getting healthy and stable doesn't happen overnight nor does it go smoothly. Think of it as a line graph, with ups and downs. Will there be times when you do regress back to old habits? Yes. But the point is that you're continuing to reach a healthy, stable life and NOT giving up.