Parents Whose children have been sexually abused Community Group
This group is for parents whose children have been sexually abused. We welcome both Mothers and Fathers. Here, we can offer support to one another. We can vent, cry and lift each other up. No condemning or criticizing allowed. We are here for support. We LOVE (((HUGS))) !
My ex husband has accepted a plea deal. It is being wrote under Jessica Law with a sentence of 25 years in prison. He will not be able to get out early due to it being wrote under Jessica Law. If he would of went to trial he could of got so much more time. He deserves more time for what he did to my daughter. Im so glad that this case is going to be over soon. He just has to plead guilty at his sentencing. Not sure when that is going to happen though. They asked if me or my daughter would like to write a victum statement for his sentencing. Im not sure I can do that and still have to ask my daughter if she would like to. This tragedy is the hardest thing I have had to deal with in my life. I still dont get why people do this to children and I dont know if I will ever figure that out. I would like to ask him Why??? Even after the monsters are sentenced that pain will not go away. I just want to crawl in a hole and never come out. I know I cant but man seeing my daughter go though the stuggles is killing me. We both see a therapist but im sick of talking about it. I just want to ignore it and the therapist says not to do that. I feel like im never going to feel like myself again and be able to trust.
Please do keep talking -- and definitely keep writing. As sick of it all as you may be, your healing journeys -- yours and your daughter's -- have just begun. From what you have said above, you have much yet to process. Please know you are not alone and that you have plenty of support here!
No number of years in prison or any human penalty could ever weigh even to the damage he has done. A plea deal does spare you of two significant things--your daughter doesn't have to testify in court, and he can't appeal a guilty verdict. Know that even if both sides agreed going in, the judge has the final say on how many years he gets. If you do decide to do a victim statement, even if it's so brief as to say, "What he has done has damaged my daughter and I to the point that I can't describe in words and I'm unable to attempt yet" could influence the judge's decision. However, that is totally a decision for you and your therapist, consulting with victim services. Sometimes a therapist can write a victim statement, at least for a minor, I'm not sure about adults, but I'm sure that all depends on the laws of where you live.
Thank you for updating us here and drop in whenever you'd like.