The abuse of my daughter (now 15) by her father was disclosed in 2006. After browsing the discussions, I have to be thankful that we did not have to fight the system just to be safe and feel for all of you that are in that situation. The Children's Safety Center here was great, her dad confessed and took a plea for a 50-year sentence (so she didn't have to testify), and we have been in counseling ever since that first day. I also have a son (now almost 13). We have dealt with so many "fall-out" issues. Last year, my kids admitted to sexual activity together (just on one occasion) and we had to navigated the court system once again. They were both listed as perpetrator and victim of the situation. Everyone, including our therapist was blown away that this happened. We have spent the last year under house arrest and a safety plan, from which we were just recently released. I think the entirety of the situation has just recently hit me over the last 6 months. I spent the first couple of years on a sort of autopilot survival mode. The fact is before turning himself in, their dad wiped out all our bank accounts, and used everything for bail and a defense attorney. I was left with no money, lost everything, including my job that I was unable to keep up with while navigating the system, and left with the responsibility for all the debts. All my energy was focused on the children and trying to get back on my feet. Ironically, now that things have stabilized in our life on that level, I guess I finally have the space to process and begin my own healing and quite honestly, I have really lost it. I feel like all the feelings of a lifetime are finally hitting me all at once. My son has also started talking more in therapy and it is so heartbreaking. It never came out before, but apparently, my daughter had told him about the abuse when he was little bitty and he had actually confronted his dad about it and had believed his dad when he said his sister was lying. It makes me want to kill that man all over again. My son is dealing with the same type of guilt as me for not protecting his sister because he believed in his dad. It just gets very overwhelming. Although I do have family therapy through the kids therapist, I am not covered under our insurance for my own therapy, so I decided to search and try to find some outside support for myself and so, here I am.