Parents of Prisoners Community Group
A group that tries to share with each other how they deal with being a good supporting parent of a prisoner and the unique problems that arise. What to share or not, how to deal with spouse of prisoner, ex-spouse of, children of prisoner which we may not see either anymore,so forth
Hi everyone, new member seeking understanding! My oldest son is going to prison for a very long time. My heart is broken but not my soul. I am a confused bundle of emotion, loving and missing him while also being so very angry at what he has done not only to himself but to his children and all the people who love him. I feel guilt, shame...spend hours trying to figure out how I failed him even though I know his crimes were not my fault. Does anyone else feel this way?
lorilk573
I think we all feel like you do. I was very upset, sad etc.. when my son was incarcerated. He made a very bad choice and has to pay for that decision. It has only been three months but I will finally admit that I am mad at him too for putting himself in that position and his family. I am embarrassed that his grandfather passed away knowing he was in prison, even though my dad told me he prayed for him every day, he was not ashamed of him and he was never disappointed in the man he was, just that one choice one night. I will keep you and your son and family in my prayers. Lori
sunworship
Thank you for your response. I struggle daily with mixed feelings. My sons crimes were fueled by a meth addiction yet I can not just excuse what he has done. He will spend the rest of his life in prison along with my grandchildren's mother. I am in California, moved here to be closer to him before I knew what he was doing. He was arrested in North Carolina, where we are from. He stole everything...my 401K, everything I had, and was mailing and delivering drugs from CA to NC. After his arrest, I set up a phone account so he could call me but all he did during the calls was yell and scream at me and ask me to help him, actually demand that I do. He left behind huge bills, storage units filled with drug paraphernalia in my name that the DEA now has. I have had to retain an attorney and I have never had so much as a parking ticket in my entire life. I don't know what to do next and sometimes I don't even want to get out of bed in the morning. I love him, but am so very angry.
susieduty
Omg, I feel exactly the same way , I had to look twice making sure I didn't write this and forgot , please contact me ,I would like to be your friend. Susieduty
sunworship
oMG! I wrote the same thing a few months ago and am in the exact same predicament!
sunworship
Geez ok I have lost my mind.....I wrote the post about my son 5 months ago!
jengrip
My son committed crimes while on meth & Xanax. I know how you feel. My son will serve 10 years and I miss him so much. My son never yells or gets angry as I'm not sure how I would handle that. I'm sure he feels helpless right now and you're the only one that can help him. Keep praying.
Ladydime
I to have these feelings so please don't feel alone. I pray for all of us living this nightmare I definitely need daily strength and am glad to find support and hope I can be a support to
sunworship
Thank you! It gives me a little hope when I know I am not alone!
dew23
I think your attitude is amazing considering what you have been through. My son, same thing. Drugs and a really bad choice. Like you we tried everything to support him and I mean everything. We lost all of our savings, home equity, 401Ks, property and finally he got arrested. His attitude has not really changed much, as he still thinks we should be doing more. Kid was a good boy, and then drugs turned him into something really ugly. I will continue to believe with you that our boys will come back to us changed. Until them we are here for him as best we can be, but we have come to the realization that he has to want to get better. We can't do it for him, but trust me I would if I could.
sunworship
Is your son now in prison?
Carole
I understand all what you going through as I am going through the same mixed feelings! Anger, compassion, hurt, guilt,worry,devastation and feel so so helpless!!! To see your child self destruct through bad choices is so heart wrenching yet their hearts are in the right place and are well liked by all. I need councilling but no groups near me so I thought this online support group may relate to all I am going through.
sunworship
Hi everyone and I hope you were able to enjoy Mom's day. Anyone from CA or NC on here? One thing I have learned through my sons incarceration is that the greatly mixed feelings I have are shared by most in our position. Some days are great while others are horrible. I can't seem to get past the wondering why my son did the things he did and what he is missing....his kids are growing up with both parents in prison. We need to support each other here because I can't find any real time groups and I believe that only a mom who has been through it can understand.
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