Parenting 'Tweens (9-12) Support Group

This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of tweens (9 to 11 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development.

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questions

tink22
tink22
my daughter who is 9 is in summer school and she is riding the bus with middle schoolers. so just about everyday she is coming home asking more questions like what is a rapists, or is a whore... some of these questions are hard to answer I want her to always come to me with her questions but lately I am having a hard time answering her questions.. any thoughts
deleted_user
deleted_user
Be Honest!!!! My daughter is also 9. She started asking questions regarding sex and where babies come from, etc. I was totally honest with her. Don't come across that you are embarassed...she will pick up on it. If you are straight forward with her you are giving her the best and she will know that you will always be there to answer her questions honestly.

You may also want to speak with the bus driver privately and tell them what conversations are being said. Just do it in a way that won't embarrass her. GOOD LUCK
deleted_user
deleted_user
My daughter is almost 11 and I can remember when my kids were riding the bus and heard all sorts of things from the older kids. When she would ask me about them, I would tell her the truth. I was upset when I heard the things but to her, I was calm and told her if she had anymore questions about anything she could always come to me and I would be honest with her. Now she is still coming to me about her body and such and it is a wonderful feeling, knowing that she trust me so much. I would also, as lovebug suggested, to talk with the bus driver. Maybe he could assign her a seat up front. I've also did that too and it seemed to help some. Good luck!!
deleted_user
deleted_user
i know my girls will not ride the bus when they go to middle school, there is to much bull going on on the bus. including sex it is unreal here
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am having an open door policy with my children where I want them to come to me with any question and they have. Sure, they are embarassing at times.. (My 11 year old son asked me how boys masterbate..) and I said to give me 5 minutes on how to think to answer.. SO, I thought about it and came back with the best answer that I thought of.. My thinking is that I want them to come to me and get the "correct" answers and not get it from older kids..
We cannot shut this out, we have to be honest with them..
deleted_user
deleted_user
you should feel good that she is coming to you with the questions. That means she trusts you and feels comfortable talking to you about anything. I would look at this as an opportunity to show her she can trust you and talk openly about anything. If you over-react or lie to her, she will know and next time she won't come to you. She is testing you. lovebug1143 is right, maybe you could privately talk to the bus driver? If things don't change, can you drive her? good luck.