Parenting Toddlers (1-3) Support Group
This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of toddlers (1 to 3 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development. Join to share your stories and get advice.
"Hi, my name's Cassie. Just joined this group.
I have a 6 year old son, Tom and a 2 1/2 year old daughter, Rileigh.
Reason I am here...besides extra support, is that I am having a very hard time with her. Unlike my son, who's never really went through terrible 2's...or terrible anything....Ri is the complete opposite. I mean, she isn't "terrible", im not saying that. She is increeedibly strong willed though.
If she doesn't like something she will scream....and scream...and scream. She has always been like this. I try to be patient with her, but it seems the more understanding I try to be with her, the more upset she gets. I don't understand what I am doing wrong. Sometimes I just end up flying off the handle and giving up.
Another thing I worry about is she's not talking very much at all, she babbles a lot still...I'm afraid when we put her into preschool in the fall...that they may not be able to work with her?
I don't know, maybe I am worrying too much. Or maybe I am a bad parent who doesn't know how to manage her kids. Most of the time I feel like pulling my hair out, I just feel OVERWHELMED. As much as I try to work through it..I still feel unbalanced. I know a lot of the problem lies with me and how impatient I am...any advice would be great. I just feel like there is this huge barrier between us, I want to bridge this gap. :/
I have a 6 year old son, Tom and a 2 1/2 year old daughter, Rileigh.
Reason I am here...besides extra support, is that I am having a very hard time with her. Unlike my son, who's never really went through terrible 2's...or terrible anything....Ri is the complete opposite. I mean, she isn't "terrible", im not saying that. She is increeedibly strong willed though.
If she doesn't like something she will scream....and scream...and scream. She has always been like this. I try to be patient with her, but it seems the more understanding I try to be with her, the more upset she gets. I don't understand what I am doing wrong. Sometimes I just end up flying off the handle and giving up.
Another thing I worry about is she's not talking very much at all, she babbles a lot still...I'm afraid when we put her into preschool in the fall...that they may not be able to work with her?
I don't know, maybe I am worrying too much. Or maybe I am a bad parent who doesn't know how to manage her kids. Most of the time I feel like pulling my hair out, I just feel OVERWHELMED. As much as I try to work through it..I still feel unbalanced. I know a lot of the problem lies with me and how impatient I am...any advice would be great. I just feel like there is this huge barrier between us, I want to bridge this gap. :/
I like to use the manners as a technique b/c although she may still act spoiled, at least she is polite with it. For example, if she wants something and begins her tyrant actions, I tell her softly, "How do you ask? SAy may I please have this or do this?" and then she will soften her tone and ask nicely. It works most of the time but then other times, she is COMPLETELY defiant and at that point i don't know what else to do but put her in "TimeOut"
My youngest daughter just turned 3. When she was 18 mo. old, I noticed that she wasn't saying much. When she wanted something, she often would grunt and point, but if we didn't understand what she wanted, she would get very upset and throw tantrums. It was SO frustrating. I asked the doctor about it. The doctor thought it was possible that she had a mild speech delay, but wanted to wait and see if she was just taking her time to start speaking because she had older siblings at her beck and call. At 2, little had changed, so I talked to the doctor again and she agreed that my daughter needed to be evaluated. We were referred to our county's Birth to 3 program and my daughter was evaluated about a month later. She required speech therapy and a therapist visited our home once every other week for 45 minutes. The therapist gave us a lot of ideas on how to get my daughter talking. About a year later now, my daughter is talking up a storm and getting easier to understand all the time. She still needs some help with certain letter sounds, but she will be going to "school" in fall to help with that.
Once my daughter started speaking with more ease and she could communicate her wants and needs more effectively, her tantrums lessened. She still is a stubborn little thing, but that is just an unfortunate genetic trait she picked up.
If you are truly concerned about your daughter's lack of speech, I would bring it up to her doctor. The doctor should be able to give you a referral so that you can take the next step and get her evaluated.
I can tell you that my youngest has been my most challenging child of the three. Speech delay aside, I often have felt guilt about different things with her because she was born at what became a very turbulent time for our family. We had several family members who were very ill at the same time, so there was a lot of stress and disorder in our lives and I feel that I wasn't able to give her quite the same quality of attention that I gave my older 2 children as babies, even though I am home with her all the time.
Sorry for rambling on. I just wanted to offer you my perspective in hopes that it might be of some help.
I also have a 2 year old (son) who I would say is in his terrible 2 phase. Although I know at times it can be very frustrating just be patient, and continue to give unconditional positive regard, and model appropriate, and or desirable behaviors.