Wow! I just read your profile! You are a big family! I am not in your position, but I have one 17 yr old daughter and I know that this could have been or be me.
I hope you will encourage her to continue her education and get in to college while the baby is still small. A baby does not know the things it is living without, but a school age child sure does! Good luck and best wishes to you all.

well my oldest is only 13 so i cant really understand what youre going thru but ive been on the other end. i was 21 when i had my first but i was a young 21 still living at home, dependant on my parents, and scared of the reaction. i told my parents at 5 months of fear that my father would drag me kicking and screaming to get an abortion or something. a rediculous thought. my parents were so supportive of my decision. its not something any parent wants to see happen for their children. it makes for a rough road. but it does not by any means that your daughters life is over. ok shes made her decision to have a baby and youve made yours to support her. great! all you can do is show her that shes loved and that having a baby at an early age does not mean she has to give up her dreams. it just might take a little longer to make them happen and it might be a lot more work to get there but with support and encouragement and of course a babysitting nana shell do just fine. life is all about choices. shes made two. first she made the choice to have sex knowing that pregnancy can be a consiquence and then she made a very grown up choice to become a mother. if she has guidance she does not have to become one of those back to school specials she can become whatever she wants. ya know, i lost my mom 4 years ago and its been a very tough thing to deal with. but having had that time for my daughters first year of life, before we got married, i lived w my parents and my mom helped me raise her. she stayed up some nights with us when she had the croup, she babysat 3 days a week so i could work parttime, and she always always showed me what being a good mother was. the day i had my daughter and my mom sat on the edge of my bed as i held her i looked up at my mother and said... wow you really love me. she smiled and said... now you know. she passed on the gift of motherhood to me and i hope to pass it on to my children (many many years from now of course:) im not sure if this is the type of reply you were looking for but i just thought id share my opinion. if you all stay strong thru the rough times (and we all know there will be pleanty of those) and support eachother and just show her the way, youll all be just fine. and just think, youre gonna have another child in your life to love. and as for your daughter... well shes going to learn love. shes about to fall inlove, i mean real real love, for possibly the first time in her life. what a gift. even tho shes recieving this gift quite early and life is about to get much more complicated for her if given the opportunity she and her child can grow up and live happy lives. i wish you and your family the very best.

HI THERE I HAVE A ALMOST 15 YEAR OLD GIRL. SHE IS NOT PREGNANT AND I REALLY HOPE SHE STAY'S THAT WAY FOR A FEW MORE YEARS. BUT I WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW THAT THE BEST THING TO DO FOR YOUR DAUGHTER IS BE THERE FOR HER. AND I AGREE THAT EDUCATION IS VERY IMPORTANT TO FINISH, SO TALK TO HER AND ENCOURGE HER TO GRADUATE. AND FOR YOU HANG IN THERE I WILL PRAY FOR YOUR FAMILY

Does having an 18 year old that had a baby 8 months ago count? if so, then I'd love to talk about it.

I have a 17 year old daughter who is 3 mos pregnant. We found this out 3 wks ago because she was really sick and is no finally getting over that part. The boys parents don't want anything to do with her or the baby, and the boyfriend she had for 1 1/2 years told her he didn't want to stay with her. She is devistated.
She originally wanted to keep the baby, but now she wants to get an abortion. It is against everything christian I stand for. She knows this, but has always been a handful and ideas of her own. I am about at my wits end with her. She knows her family is supportive and always has been. Unfortunately, we have spoiled her and she thinks you are able to just "fix" this quickly too. She is so emotional!
She finally went back to school this week with the help of the counselors at school. I am so greatful to them.
Thanks for listening.
JillS

First it's not your fault by any means and alhtough we feel guilty like we have done something wrong, I bet you weren't in the rom during this act of conception. Hard as it is our role is to beloving and supportive.. at time like this it can be difficult... Last year my then 18 year old asked me on early morning what it felt like to have mono, and the what it felt like to be pregnant... Mind you we were having this conversation @ 7:00 B4 school. I knew that I had a really good kid, similar to yours asking me this bizarre ? So I told her I felt when I was pregnant w/ her. Happy ending ...she wasn't !!! Thank God, but she could have been. She was involved with this young man for 3 years, and although I repeatedly told her IF or WHEn you get to this point, please let me know and we will do whatever possible. After the scare was over we had a long talk that included things like Why? Don't you realize that this would be your responsibility and not his ( he could go off to school /college and you would be left back here taking care of your child? However much preaching you have done in the past.. it's now that she needs you...Good Luck , I'm here if you need to talk! XOXO

Thanks, I know that education is important, she just passed 11 GCSEs, and had a place to start A-levels at college, but she has decided to take a year out, and start next september, so she doesn't miss out on too much. Part of me wants to wrap her up, and support her, because she's still my baby (shes the eldest) but then another part of me wants to leave her to it, because she got into this situation. I mean, i will always be there for her and i've said i will look after the little one while my daughter goes to college, but i don't want her to think i will do everything for her

Hi, I was a teenage mum. I am now in my 40's, my daughter is 23 and travelling round the world at the mo with her boyfriend. I am very proud of her and dispite being so young, I was pregnant at 17, I don't regret it, it was hard and I grew up fast but it made me a better person I think with more love and compassion for others. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. I am so glad to hear you are supporting your daughter I did not have it so easy, my father wanted to throw me out of his home but my mother was and has always been there for me, a real brick and an angel and I love her so much for it. Wishing you all, peace, love, health and happiness.

h, i dont have a pregnant teenager but,i was one at 16 too, firstly your not a bad parent,you cant be around your daughter 24/7, and as for the comments youve probably had already like my mum and i got, ignore it, i know its really hard and can boil your blood but be the bigger person.
these people are so narrow minded im surprised thier blood is able to flow threw thier brain.
i managed perfectly fine at 16,was scared at first about every single birthing and parenting issue going which im sure your daughter is, im sure your daughter and you will be fine. xxxx

First of all, you're an amazing and supportive parent. You love your daughter and you want the best for her but you also don't want her to rely on you for everything. It's a tough situation.

While I don't have a pregnant teen, I did have my son 2 days after my 20th birthday. I really had no idea what I was doing. My mom was very supportive but she also let me know that it was my decision and that I would have to be responsible for every aspect of that child's life. Well, when the baby came, she helped out more than she said she would and she loved him like her own but she also made sure that I took parenting classes, learned how to feed and bathe the baby. I learned how to cook and I eventually went back to school. My mom gave me a ton of great advice and was there when I really needed her. With her wisdom and guidance, I no longer depended on her for necessities but I couldn't have done it without her loving support and occasional babysitting!

I would support your daughter but yes, make sure she finishes school and have her enroll in some type of parenting and mommy and me classes. I think it's so important!

Also, I love the other members thoughtful and respectful responses. This is what Daily Strength is all about!

Your daughter is SO LUCKY to have a mother that she could come to and tell... Even though it took her awhile she still came to you. I had my son when I was 17. The first month I was preg. I thought I might be, but I never told anyone and I lied myself into believing I wasn't. I had my son at home in the bathroom because of denial. Don't let anyone blame you for her actions. There are a billion reasons why she could have made the choices she did. And a billion more why you couldn't have known. I agree with the other posters, make sure she stays in school. See if there are any special programs her school might offer... Help her when you can. Try to keep "dad" in the picture. Her baby will need his/her daddy. My son lost out on that and suffered through his first 8 years of life asking why dad wasn't there, and all that. Luckily dad is around now. If you ever want to talk just send me a message. If she needs to talk she can send me one too. It feels like yesterday that I was living that life. I took a hard road. I quit school, got my GED later in life and went to college. (though college took much longer to get through). Anyway. Been there; done that.

Best of luck to the both of you.

I don't have a pregnant teen but i know that it must makes you a real big person to accept this situatin and to not try and force her to adopt the baby or give it to the fathers family. I wish all famililes were as supportive as you. I have alot of respect for you.

oh she's not a slut she's just fertile. I was fooling around at that age its just that my boyfriend didn't know what he was doing so he gave up. Most parents and kids don't admit there having sex but trust me they always have done and always will.

I would just like to thank you all for your kind, and helpful words. It's going to be a struggle, but i'm sure we will make it. thank you again for your kind words.
K xx

You are not a bad mother but a concerened mother and a mother who loves your child very much which at this age they are still children we have to admitt. I have a 16 year old daughter whom this year has had her first sexual exp with a man who is 19. She met him in Feb of this year at a Ski church camp trip. Ok When I first met this young man I was inpresed because he had told me he was a virgin and had no desires to have sex, well i was at ease. Untill my daughter went home to her fathers after summer vac and called me one night at about 11:00 pm and told me they had sex a total of 3 times first time in my home, 2 others his moms and 2 out of three times unpretected. I was not mad at all but hurt because we are open and i thought very close but she could not tell me face to face.I have talked to her about birth control before this all happen and she said she was not ready. Well now she is back at home and am concered she will make that mistake again. Her dad has no clue what she has done. I could of been in your shoes right now as I type this but,am not. My heart goes out to being by her side. I was 17 when i got preg with my daughter