Parenting Teenagers (12-18) Support Group
This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of teenagers (12 to 18 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development.
It seems this is all I hear from my 15 year old.. Well enough is enough you lost tought I'm not replacing it you forgot tough. you'll do withouot.. when it come to school if you lose it or forget then there will be consequences. I now have him get a weekly report signed by each teacher regarding his progress.. Well he lost it,,, Trust me I'm not buyin it os he is not under house for one week or until he gets a good weekly report... VENTING this seems to go on ever week...I know many of you are going thru the same... MAY WE STAND STRONG AND PRESVERE...
If they keep forgetting things that are important to them, this is the sign there is a problem. If they forget things others want from them, it is not really a memory problem but more of a motivation problem.
However, kids forget things if remembering them is painful. If you deal with the forgetting too much, you will make him a forgetful kid. If you pay attention and reward him for remembering, he will remember.
Rule # 1 do not use the word forget. Say, did you remember to bring this home? or Please remember to bring this home today yes, it will take time ( statistically, it will take about 3 weeks for the brain to switch from forgetting to remembering but remember you need time) keep saying, I expect you to remember to bring this home today use the word remember 276 times a day ( well, I just said the number that came into my head but you get the point)
Rule # 2 At least twice a day, find something he remembered and say It is great you remembered to bring this home I am proud of you for remembering to bring this home today even on small tiny things remembered to clean your bag I am so happy you remembered to call me when you knew you were coming late
Rule # 3 As much as you are angry avoid sarcasm. Do not say lucky you did not forget your head or anything like that. One: it contradicts rule # 1 of not using the word forget at all. Two: it is aggressiveness in disguise. Kids that receive aggressive messages from people close to them become trapped in the Self Fulfilling Prophecy and start thinking of themselves as forgetful kids and this is exactly what you do not want them to be.
In life, you get what you focus on. Focus on remembering.
Ronit
The Happiness Coach
http://www.ronitbaras.com