Hi there Melinda!! I went through the same thing with my daughter who is now 4.5. She would not go poopoo on the potty at all. For some unknown reason, the day she turned 4 it was like someone had flipped the swith with her. From that day on she has been completly potty trained with the exception of one or two mishaps because she waits till the last minute to go to the bathroom. Im not really sure what kind of advice i can give you but hang in there. Could you try telling him that he cant start pre-school (assuming he has not started yet) untill he goes on the potty? Good luck! Let us know how it goes

Hi Melinda-
I'd like to share a couple of things based on my experience. Firstly, why don't you take a break from the training process right now...wait a couple of weeks before trying something new or something tried before.

Before sharing what may be more of a novel approach, I would always like to bring up the reward system, but not with toys/presents but actually calling the grandparents whenever something positive happens. Just remember, important to have grandparents up to the task as they have to make it such a special deal when "pooping" in the potty occurs.

Another method involves beginning with just getting him to poop in the diaper in the bathroom. Over time, get him to poop in his diaper on the toilet. After having him comfortable with this, then actually cut out a hole in the diaper so when he sits on the toilet, it actually lands in the toilet. This process can take some time so be patient.

But be patient, the day will come.

Dr. J

Hey Melinda,

You may have already tried this, but it worked like a charm with my daughter. We started a potty bank. Every time she went to the bathroom, we'd throw a quarter or two into a potty bank. We let her know that once it was filled up, she would be able to use that as spending money on our Disney trip. That's all the incentive that she needed! Just a thought...

Good luck!

yeah thats frustrating... I can relate. My son is 3 1/2 and for us and maybe you did some of this but I switched him to underware which since your son pees on the potty you have probably done this and we did a sticker chart reward type system and he loved that! Is he constipated at all cause my son sometimes has accidents cause it hurts him. I know its hard!

My son was almost 4 when he went poopy for the first time. I had tried everything before that but one day I caught him just at the right time and he did it. I saw that look on his face and said come on lets sit on the potty and I had to hold him so he wouldn't fall in, ( he was affraid that he would fall in the potty) he poopied and we made a huge deal about it! We called grandparents, gave him a special "Poopy Prize" (I had saved the toys out of the happy meals, they don't know they come with a toy) every time he went poopy and had clean dry pants he got to pick a prize out of the prize bag. He has not had a accident yet. Knock on wook.

I agree with Dr. J to take a break. Figure out what your plan for potty training is and stick with it. Are you going to do reward chart, treat, positive reinforcement etc?

We had issues with my son and his pooping on the potty. I knew he could, but it was his control over his environment that he wouldn't.

We told him on his 3rd birthday that 3 yr olds go poopy in the potty, looking at us with huge wide eyes like WOW, we though we had him. But the following day, he went on the potty. BIG DEAL!!!! Then an accident. We reminded him that if he went in his pants, then all his 3 yr old presents would go away because 3 rd olds go on the potty. Now, when he goes, he gets cars back. When he has an accident or is misbehaving, he looses cars. HE VALUES CARS. Lately, every time he goes, he is saying I make you very happy right?!!! A switch was turned.

Oh, and now, if he has an accident (maybe not totally the poopy ones), I make him clean it up. I give him the towel to make him blot up the pee etc. I clean it later too but make him responsible for cleaning it up.

Wow I thought that I was reading something that I have written!! My son is also turning 4 next month and is still wearing diapers and has no interest at all in potty training. Let me know if you find anything that works and I will do the same. Good luck-Deb3

My daughter had some issues with the potty as well and I did a sticker chart. We decorated it and she would get to put a sticker on it everytime she went potty. I hung it up in the kitchen for her to see..and after she gets a certain amount of stickers I give her a reward...also, it may help to track what times your son is going poo..and putting him on the potty at that time.
Hope this helps & GOOD LUCK!! I know how tiring it can be.
=)

I had issues with my son who is 3 1/2 and poopy was our issue. He was actually constipated so that was our problem so I just wanted to bring that issue up. I know its frustrating. We also did a sticker chart which worked wonders and I made him wear underwear. We still have issues when he is constipated but he is doing alot better. It helps that his younger sister took to it well so he uses her as a role model! GOOD LUCK...

Hi there. What a familiar problem. My son had identical issues but.. he literally was constipated so I sought out help from my pediatrician. He was prescribed medication for constipation. Is your son constipated? I will say it surely hepled. Is your son strong willed? I know for us potty training my son was a huge struggle for us. If we asked him to go he would throw a fit. He only wanted to go when he wanted too. Maybe you could take a break right now. Maybe he wont feel the pressure and he will just do it on his own. Good luck! I really feel your frustration. Let me know how it goes. By the way what day is his birthday? My son is turning 4 on March 11th.

Hey Melinda,
If your son likes sticker this might work for you. We just potty trained our 2 1/2 year old daughter and we have a sticker chart in the bathroom and we told her that everytime she goes she can put a sticker on the chart. Worked like a charm. Hope that helps.

I finally got my daughter potty trained when she was 2 after 3 failed attempts. All I did was go online to the Charmin website and ordered their potty trainer kit Basically just type in "Free Charmin Potty Training Kit" on google and you can get from 100 different sites. It comes with stickers and a magnet for the fridge when they finally get it and a book.. it's really neat and it only took me a week! Give it a try if you have time and I wish you the best of luck!

When my son turned 4, he was trained. Just like that. Don't stress - it will happen, just not on your schedule. Let him know the potty is there for him to use, and don't turn it into a battle of wills. As long as he's not going to his senior prom in a diaper, you did your job :)

my son was the same way at 3yrs, we tried at all, stickers, m&m's his fave, everything we could think of, then one day i put him in "his" boxers (just like daddy) and said these are your shorts don't get them wet. it worked, from then on he went to the potty, he even went with out any accidents. we knew he was ready, and could do it. we even hid the diapers we had so he did not see them. then we had the diaper fairy come and bring him more boxers he thought that was cool. i hop it helps,

like a lot of people here, I to have an almost 4 yr old son... but I belive that his biggest problem is that when he's with me (dad and I are divorced) I put undies on him,sit him on the potty every 2 hours, ask him if he needs to go, the works... when he's with dad... diapers! diapers! diapers! he says he has no time to be training him (he stays at home all day due to disability). so my son is just confused... like you, if there's any thing that helps let us know!