Talk to him about it. Just remember, you aren't the only one feeling the changes the baby brings. After my daughter was born was the first time either of us rejected the other, but not the last. Being tired is something that occurs way more now!

We couldn't have sex for my entire pregnancy (due to cervical issues). So, the last time we were 'together' was early Dec of last year!!! I'm 8 weeks post partum & we just did it for the first time tonight. We waited until both of us were very ready. Your husband might just need a little more time. Try not to take it personally & don't put too much into the 1st time. My hubby was so afraid he'd hurt me (and I was afraid it would hurt!!!) that it was very weird. I think it will be better next time because we'll be less afraid.

Good luck!

It took us about 3 months post partum to be intimate and it wasn't really pleasant for me until 7-8 months. I found that we're both more tired now and more busy. What works well for us is if I say something like "let's plan to have sex on Saturday evening". I know this is totally not romantic but somehow it gets us in the mood better than waiting for it to happen spontaneously.

I think for us it was around 8-10 weeks. To be honest, I really don't enjoy it! My DD is 6 months old now, and we're both still so tired that we really aren't too motivated! We also do what kaja does...sort-of "plan" when to "be together" so that we can take care of any housework or other stuff so that we don't have to stress out about it and can relax more. Not romantic, but you have to do whatever works for you! Good luck!

I think this is normal...When I was big prego dh was kind of freaked out so we didnt do anything, after having our babes (they are 12 mo n 2 days apart) he was still freaked out b/c he didnt want to get me prego...I agree with joleneLS communication is the key. I am very open with dh about everything, its hard for me to hold back my feelings and it was important for me to have that intimacy back in our relationship, after I told him that he made more of an effort!

The hard thing for us is that he doesn't live with me and the baby, and when we do plan to meet he usually calls and tells me that he can't make it. He is working so hard and it is alot of manual labor, but when we first got together he was doing the same work that he is now. I tried to talk to him about it yesterday and he told me that I was making him feel bad for not being around more. I told him that wasn't what I was trying to do that I just wanted to talk about us. About 2 minutes later he left. My mind keeps wondering if there is someone else on the side, but knowing that yall went through something like this too makes me feel a little better.

I'm sorry to hear you are having a tough time. It is a transition.

DH and I were not intimate for the last 2 months of my pregnancy and I didn't feel 'healed' until at least 8-10 weeks (i had a severe tear). Even though the doctor cleared me at 6 weeks, I still waited and it wasn't pleasant at all for me the first few times. Now, at 4 months pp, we fit intimacy in whenever and wherever we can - if it's been more than a week, we actually schedule a date :).

I would think that your fiance not living with you would make it even more difficult to find time to be together. Maybe you could arrange for childcare and just order in dinner and some romance? Let him know that you are ready to be with him again. He may also be nervous about jumping back in.

With my first daughter we waited 4 weeks post partum but overall in the months after she was born we were both more tired then before and settled for less "us" time. I am now pregnant with our third and our life has for sure been busier then expected with our oldest having cancer as well as hubby and I both work full time shift work but we make sure to make time for each other. Even if its not to have sex but I make sure we have "us" time. Snuggles, skin to skin (even if it's while sleeping), hold hands while sleeping, hugs and kisses etc ... It's the small things that make a difference for us. Hang in there and I hope you find something that works for you and your relationship.

My hubby isn't turned off by ANYTHING....we had sex up a day or so before our C Section(my hubby was there for that)...then at 2 weeks we had sex for the first time..it wasn't the most comfortable but we were careful.

Good Luck...some people have a tough time..some men see U different after..just talk to him..maybe he was tired. I lost my sex drive after having our daughter and really it was well over a year before it started to come back...and it's still a work in progress..I changed in our situation

Thanks for all of yall's advice. We talked about it and we ended up solving the problem this afternoon. We both feel so much better and we are going to start planing and schedualling our "personal" time. Again thanks to everyone ... yall are awesome!!!!

It's amazing how much less fighting happens when you are both getting a little action :)

My husband can't get over seeing me in L&D and then have the c/s. He said it was weird to see my outsides, lol. He said also said it's hard for him to see me as sexual and not just a mommy. I think he's being immature about it all. We've been fighting about this for a while now. it sucks very bad.

Another thing I've discovered is that no man can resist a naked chic. So you could just get in the mood, get naked (or so) and seduce him :) Not ideal, I know, but should be pretty effective.

With my son we didnt have much sex during pregnancy, mostly because i felt so tired and weak. By 6 weeks after i had my baby boy was when we first made love again. As soon as the bleeding stops. With my daughter we had more sex during pregnancy, and were back at it by 4 weeks after we had her. My husband was there for the birth and looked down there and everything while i pushed our baby out lol. It don;t bug him. I hear for some guys its takes them abit to get pass that whole thing. but with Jonathan it dont bother him. He dont turn me down but then again i don;t ask much, its mostly him. Sorry your having a tough time.

Kristen- that sort of happened to me. Get him to counseling because that is a tough thing to get over on your own. You are right, it is immature but saying it isnt going to help the situatrion. I can relate to how abandoned and angry you must feel.