its easy to recover now, so you only need to decide that you want to recover, many like you dont

Idk, I've never met anyone that didn't want to recover lol. I know you want to recover. Keep pushing yourself!

start by breathing deep and slow with muscles relaxed, this will calm you
stay with us and read the other posts

YOU have my empathy. YOU ARE NOT a "terrible mom" for having panic attacks. So long as you feed, clothe, protect, love, and are willing to die for your child YOU ARE A GOOD MOM!! So you have panic attacks! You are human!! We are all human. I am human. HANG ON!!!! PLEASE HANG ON!!!!! YOU CAN CONQUER THIS!!!!

During times of high stress/panic/anxiety it's hard for us to b that person we want to be. I'm a mom too and constantly feel as if I just haven't done enough, and like u when I have high anxiety I can't be that mom I want to be because my mind is so busy. The good news is that u recognize it. Now u can start to try to take steps to minimize it. For example once u start getting the feelings- the dreaded " oh no it's back" Try to make time for u.. Whether its going out w a friend or family member for a couple hours, reading, getting a massage, going to a gym or doing an exercise video at home. Lol it's taking the time out to make yourself a " me" appointment. These appointments are very hard to get and sometimes months to get in lol but are important for our well-being. I hope this helps a bit :).

You are still a good mom, and a good wife. You are just having some mental health issues that you have to address right now. It's good you are reaching out for help. A lot of people are scared to do this. You are brave. Have you talked to a therapist? How about going to the doctor and start taking some meds? This will make you feel better. Do not feel guilty about something that you cannot help.

My son is 31 years old now, but after he was born I suffered from massive panic attacks, which continued for many years. As a result, my husband would often take my son out for the day, to give me relief, although we would still do things together as a family on my better days. Although I didn't feel able to do the "active" type family outing things with my son very often, the thing I was able to do for him was to listen when he was hurting, and the panic disorder I suffered from gave me the sensitivity to help my son in this way.

I often felt guilty about not doing things with my husband and son, but on good days, if you could find ways to be with your son, such as having talks with him or doing quiet things, I think these kinds of activities are even more important than more "dramatic" ways of being with him -

I have tears in my eyes reading everyone's kind words. Thank you so much. I was blessed w/ a few good hours this weekend which I spent w/ my son. We all have to fight harder than most for our good moments, but we appreciate them so much more. We all have to keep fighting!