Panic Attacks Support Group

A panic attack is a period of intense fear or discomfort, typically with an abrupt onset and usually lasting no more than thirty minutes. Symptoms include trembling, shortness of breath, heart palpitations, sweating, nausea, dizziness, hyperventilation, and sensations of choking or smothering. Panic attacks can be very sudden, appear to be unprovoked, and are often...

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Anxiety Disorders
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anxiety before his girlfriend

Spirit13
Spirit13
I try so hard to be patient with my boyfriend.
He has panic attacks and a fear of going out anywhere that is of a distance.

But this of course means we don't go 'out' to things, miss events and a lot of new adventures.

I have tried to be silent, or encouraging, or sympathetic... but it's getting up my spine! I've had a panic attack before sure but I'm starting to feel like he's a real cop out with them, because he says he'll come to something I want him to but then turns it down and nevER plans to go out anywhere (like the city particularly) with me without my suggestion.Not that he'd come with my suggestion anyway!

I know life's too short to let anyone hold you down, but I want to have fun with him and go on new adventures- and it's such a big thing to me. I've tried telling him this before but there's a point before I sound like a nag or pressurer and it's starting to really piss me off!! I feel like he'll always be like this, and if that's the case... hmmmm!!!!

We've been dating for nearly 2 years now.
deleted_user
deleted_user
It sounds like you might really need to evaluate what you really want in life. I have panic disorder and I know my husband has had a hard time with not being able to do all the things we used to. If your boyfriend is seeking help, I think he can get better, if he is not you need to decide whether it is worth it for you to stick it out with him. It sounds like his problem right now does not fit in with the lifestyle you want, which is unfortunate because he is probably a really great guy despite having panic disorder.
Spirit13
Spirit13
Yeah, he is a great guy. I encouraged him to see a counsellor months ago (with much coaxing in the best way I could! and he went- ONCE. and never went back. He isn't seeking help by anyone really... he has shared that he has the disorder with a group of friends though so that's something but at the same time means he won't go 'out' as much with them either because of this disorder... I feel he's hiding behind it and not really doing enough. I don't see that he's making enough efforts (but if I say this to him he'll get completely offended as follows the pattern of our communication around panic). I'm a bit of a push-over / softie and I hate to think I'm letting his panic win by letting him get away with it too often.
He's extremely defensive about it so that makes things difficult in general. If he has this for the rest of his life- then I don't want to have to carry him. I love him but yes, re-evaluation time I agree...
If you have faith, please pray for me to make the right decision here! Because of course, No one is without faults!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I can understand him not wanting to go, I have the same problem. Try telling him that you would really enjoy going out, but if he's not comfortable yet then he can give it some more time.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I know exactly how he feels. I feel bad for my husband because of this but he sticks by me and supports and encourages me. I know you feel like your getting the short end of the stick but love conqures all.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I've had anxiety and panic attacks on and off for 11 yrs. It's been tough on my husband but he's stuck by me. You should know that this is something that your boyfriend will always have. Not to say that he won't be able to learn to deal with it given the appropriate tools but getting professional help is the first step he needs to take. At least he made an attempt to see a doctor. I know my first time I almost ran out of the waiting room. Maybe he needs some "hand holding". Maybe you could suggest going with him to an appointment. Or if he's not ready for that why not suggest he become a member of this site like you did. At least then he'd realize he wasn't alone and this could be theraputic for him. I know you have a tough decision to make about your future together but it seems like he has a true friend in you if anything else as you care enough about him to inquire. Believe me when I say it's important that he knows he has a friend he can talk to even if you decide to end your current relationship.