I think it is great that you want to keep him, itis important that your husband be on board with you, is the little guy on any medsd for the adhd? there is not really meds for ODD,there are meds that can curb the anger.but nothing for it specifically, anyway, therapy for the whole famuily and for him is very important, structure and routine, and it may be some of the issues are not really ODD, but issues with being in the system and not sure of what tomorrow is going to be bring. he needs stability. if you are serious about adopting him then you will need to do some kind of famliy therapy anyway,. so they should be able to help you with a behavior plan and how to deal with his moods, early intervention is important and will better prepare him to be more successful; later on,these kisd can emotionally and physiacally drain you of any energy. they are hard on you and they are on a marriage, support is very important.for all of you, there will be good days and bad days and horrible days,. but with love and structure and rules and support you can do it, if he is in school does he have an IEP? with him having adhd he can get one and that may be able to adress him behaving in school, some of his beahvuiors are probalrey due to the reason he is in the system, hopefully with patience and understanding and a firm but loving attitude towards his behaviors this can be taken care of. I think if you feel strongly about keeping him you need to sit dwom and havea heart to heart with your hubby, and work on the being on the same page to being this little guy's family, this little guy did not ask for the issues he has, or to be shoved into he system, he deserves to be loved, and I think it is great that you want too, he is not perfect,but no child is. wether they belong to us or not. good luck,

I agree with jillybugsmom that your husband MUST be onboard if you are going to keep this child. It must be a total family therapy. Just be prepared for what may lie ahead. Lots of hugs and lots more patience.