Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) Support Group
Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) an ongoing pattern of disobedient, hostile, and defiant behavior toward authority figures that goes beyond the bounds of normal childhood behavior. When a child cannot seem to control his anger or frustration, even over what seems to be trivial or simple to others, the child will often react in violent or negative ways to his own...
Hello. I would like to start off saying I am not promoting any program. I just want to share what I learned in the first of 10 on-line parent training sessions through Beyond Consequences (beyondconsequences.com). Heather Forbes indicates that all behavior is based on two emotions, Love and Fear. I have always known my child has a lot of anger and insecurities and after the first class I took yesterday, I realize now that he is scared. The program teaches us parents how to talk to our children and really listen to them to find what the underlying problem is when they act out. I am very excited to go through the program to see if it will help me connect with my son and be able to make him feel safe. The program cost $197 plus $16 for the book and you get 2 log ins, usually for you and your spouse. Of course my husband isn't participating so guess who WANTED to take the training with me? His Resource Teacher at his middle school! I am hoping she will get a lot from the class to help her understand the kids she deals with such as my son. She has all of the behavior disorder kids in her homeroom and acts as their case manager through out the day. I will keep you all posted as I go through the training to let you know how it works. I am feeling very hopeful and know it won't happen overnight but I think we can all agree we will try anything at this point! Have a great day!
Just skip over the instructions at the beginning as this was actually a live test drive so she was going over the technical stuff. She will probably have another live test drive in August since the next class starts Aug 25th.
I will give you an example of how this worked. My son got into a lot of trouble at school at tuesday and ended up with an in school suspension for the rest of that day and all of the next. To add to it, he had to serve a detention on Tuesday for something he did last week.He was also not allowed to compete in the last track meet that night. I left work early to get him knowing he was going to be totally dyregulated (pissy mood, intolerable, etc) He got in the car and just started yelling about how he was going to beat the crap out of the kid he felt got him into trouble and then he was going to do the same to the coach for not letting him go. Instead of telling him to stop talking like that I just listened and I told him, "wow, you really did have a bad day, you are very mad aren't you? It's okay to be mad." So he ranted and raved all the way home, went in the house to his room. I stayed outside and called the principal to request they turn his in school suspension for the following day to an out of school suspension as i felt my son would not be able to get through the next day in solitary confinement. they were fine with that. i went to my son's room and he was upset and he was sarcastic to me telling me to go ahead and take my XBox and computer (usual consequence for suspensions). I told him I thought he had had enough punishment from school and that I thought he needed to cool down and he does that best when he plays his games. So I sat on the bed with him for a while and once he realized I was not mad at him and was not going to punish him further he just started sobbing telling me how stressful school was and he couldn't take it anymore, it was just too hard for him. I have know this for some time now, but to hear him say it was awesome. We are going to look into getting him into a smaller non traditional school for next year when he is in 8th grade. We had an awesome evening that night and we had the best day yesterday. i took the day off with him and we went to lunch and picked up a recliner at the Goodwill for his room (he paid for it)and the two of us even managed to get it out of the van, into the house and into his bedroom on our own without screaming and yelling. this is about the 3rd time I have used the program techniques, at least that i did right! :-) I have screwed it up a couple of times but that is to be expected.