Hi there,

I also have social anxiety, and have done the same exact thing with not wanting to make eye contact and looking down at people's private parts areas instead. And then I worry that they noticed and think I am weird or something.

But like you said, you are not looking at their private parts on purpose. And even if you were, what would that mean? You wouldn't be a bad person, even if that were the case. But it isn't the case anyway.

I think of OCD as a bully - it likes to pick things that it knows will upset us, and then make us obsess about them over and over. And the cruel irony of it all is the more we stop trying to obsess and have the thoughts, the more we have them. I find it most helpful to accept the thoughts I am having by brushing them off and saying something like, "That's just my stupid OCD" or whatever feels right for you to say. In time, the worries will fade.

As for making other people uncomfortable, do you know this for a fact? Have people come to you and told you that you are making them feel uncomfortable? I have found in my own experience that I often worry people are thinking certain things, when in reality, it is just my own mind creating scenarios that don't exist. I think this is a common thing, especially with OCD.

I am wondering if you have ever sought out any treatment for your OCD and social anxiety. Both are incredibly treatable, and there is hope. Lots of love to you as well :)

Firts of all thank you so mucho for responding, you have no idea how i appreciate it! :) I am in treatmente right now actually, I have been in treatment for a month officially, but I still havent seen any results and I am not on meds! OCD is so horrible sometimes and like you say a HUGE bully but I know I have to accept the fact that I have this illness and all we can do is learn postive ways to deal with it.

Social anxiety is also extremely debilitating :(, but I am also treating this type of anxiety but some days I just want to lock myelf in my room and never have to face anyone. No one has ever come up to me and told me I make them uncomftrable but I dont know sometimes I get that feeling, but I guess the best thing we can do is accept all these intrusive thoughts and learn to deal with all these situations just focusing on the postive things! I send you lots of love, and thanks again for responding! Im here whenever you need something! :)

I see that you are seeing a psychologist for this I need to find a good one before I take my life I don't know wat to do. It's driving me crazy I have lost my whole family and every friend I had behind this Im scared I'm not going to be able to raise my kids around there family or period because I'm always running from people because of this my girlfriend always wants to go places but I don't like to because of my situation so she found someone who would I just don't know what to do but blow my brains out I'm tired of it I'm not the same person it stresses me out so bad please help me you know how I feel I can't talk to nobody else about this the just dot understand

You aren't the only one with this. I know it seems like it... and you probably feel isolated and alone. I know this feeling because I have it too. I don't really talk about it with family or friends and I'm starting a new quest to try and find a decent psychiatrist. Don't give up on yourself!

Ahhh!....iam soo happy to have found a group of ppl i can talk to about this...this is by far thee MOST EMBARRASSING ISSUE IVE EVER HAD I HAVE BEEN GOING THRU THIS FOR 10 YRS OFF AND ON AMD I AM A 27YR OLD WOMAN WITH 3 KIDS AND A LOVJNG HUSBAND BUT FOR SOME REASON THIS EVIL THING WONT LEAVE ME ALONE IM SEPARATE MYSELF FROM EVERYBODY && LETS GET THIS STRAIGHT IM AM NOT GAY O DNT LIKE GIRLS AT ALL....BUT I CNT STOP LOOKING AT PPL CLEAVAGE AND CROTCHES ITS SO HORRIBLE I HAVE BEEN ASKING GOD TO TAKE THIS AWAY I LOST FRIENDS AND SOME FAMILY MEMBERS I CNT BE AROUND BCUS THEY ARE A TARGET FOR ME AND I NEVA WANNA MAKE PPL FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE!! I REALLY NEED HELP AND FAST BEFORE IT TOO LATE

I went through a period of this when I was in junior high! It was when my OCD was first manifesting. I kind of just grew out of it, but have you tried ways to manage maybe looking at their mouth or their nose? It might help them THINK you are looking at them without feeling the awkwardness of looking in someones eyes :) Just a thought!

Yes! I do this too. And I start having all these thoughts like they can see me staring...stop staring... but then I feel compelled to stare more. And I'm not sexually attracted to these people at all. I have found that this happens mostly when I'm anxious. When I'm with people that I'm super comfortable with and I'm not stressed, it doesn't seem to happen. I feel so embarrassed when this happens. I'm glad I'm not alone. I also went through a phase when I was going to church that I would stare at my pastors privates and I would picture her nipples pierced. And it was terribly embarrassing. I couldn't stop this thought and the more it happened, the more often it happened because the more I was afraid of it happening I would accidentally think about that thought. She would always ask me if I was okay and I would just look at her and say ....yes..... Ugh Anxiety is awful.

I have developed this problem too..
I’ve gone through 38 yrs of not noticing other women’s boobs..
Even on the beach or at the pool..
Now it slowly began and has gotten worse the last 2 yrs..
I was dx with OCD at 14 and have experienced other forms of “difficulty looking at people”

I too have ocd regarding eye contact. It's literally gone on for over 6 years and drives me absolutely insane. I completely feel you pain and am sorry to hear that you struggle with this as well..

It has been really painful for me because it makes me feel uncomfortable around EVERYONE ALL THE TIME. Which makes me very lonely. & then I beat myself up like what's wrong with you? What type of person doesn't even know how to make eye contact normally? Everyone thinks your weird, you make them uncomfortable...etc

It makes it impossible to focus or have a meaningful conversation when it's all you can think about. And it's been bothering me so much lately that I think about it when I'm alone, worry about my next social interactions, avoid going out with friends. I even study people on tv trying to "learn" what "normal" eye contact is, fustrating and is really debilitating in my life.

I appreciate you sharing your story and hope you find some type of relief. If nothing else, at least we aren't alone.

I haven’t had this as a severe problem, but I do find myself looking down at peoples privates when I’m trying not to make eye contact occasionally. When I find myself doing that, I try to redirect myself and look st their stomach or something so I’m not quite staring at their sensitives. Is there any way that maybe you could try having something in your hand that you look at instead, that is just something that I have found to be helpful, I always carry my favorite stressfubakk and look down at I’m when I’m avoiding eye contact. Hope that’s helpful! Always here if you need anything❤️

Hello everyone! I have been gone from this group for 5 years! I am still in CBT and I have seen so much progress. With this particular problem of staring at othets private parts I was able to get better. I realized through therapy that many people dont notice where you are looking and even if they do and even if they feel uncomftrable and even if they think you are creepy ITS OKAY. That was the only way I was able to get better. I accepted the fact that when im nervous I may do this and I started exposing myself to thede situations. And now i can deal with them perfectly. THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE! I send you a so much love! Hugs for everyone!

I'm also facing the same problem since 2004 but almost 4 years back I found a solution. I'm using an eyeglass with 5-8% mercury coating (outer side). while you are speaking to someone, they couldn't see your eye balls because of the mercury. They just think the glass is reflecting the light. The mercury coating level shouldn't be more than 8%. Initially I was using 8% coating and recently I reduced it to 5%.

I'm sure It will work... just try it and let me know the result.