I'm sorry you've had to endure so much and that you feel so broken. Now you have all the time you need to focus on yourself and deal with having MS.

You sound like a fighter to me so I think the sooner you get on with fighting this MS, the better you will be. I've read and read and read that you must push the physical limitations each day in order to gain strength. I know you've been doing a physical job and have been strong. Weight training and purposeful exercise is a different story though. I've been turning my spare room into our private gym. It's helping me.

If you need some encouragement, check out John Ratey, MD and his book SPARK. It helped close the case for me that exercise is the key to feeling, thinking and being able to move.

Hope your spirits are lifted today!! You can deal with this and will be better off for it. I know I am.
~Lorrie

Thank you Lorrie, As it goes I guess this is the first time in a long long time I have given in to feeling so ..... useless, losing the Job I loved and have done all my working life Kinda brought everything rushing in over the last few months of the last few years.
I am a fighter and ex Army...but I'm just running out of purpose.
Thanks for your kind words xx

Have you talked to a hospital / neurologist/ VA about starting a local support group for MS. You would be providing valuable insight, perspective and help to others who are either been newly diagnosed or been in the ring for a while. This would be a great service to your community and there may even be a small monitory benefit too.

I am sorry about your spouse....the tough times prove out who's in it for the long haul. There are other people out there though and women like a man who can listen to them and love them. You never know what is around the corner.

There are people who care so don't give up hope.
All my best bear hugs,
EP

ditto!! lets help each other!! hugs it does get ya down!!
i will help pull ya up!! tickey

Thanks to you all for your kind words, I'm a bit of a realist so often feel physically alone and somewhat useless.... Its just getting harder to believe that I would be good for... (not to) ,,, anyone, .......I can hide behind a smile and enjoy the right company but...... its hard to feel useful to that anyone.
I guess Time will tell.
Love to you all xx

Hi Jim.
I used to work in the aviation industry myself and can just begin to imagine how hard it would be to go from being a "macho" mechanic to someone who needs to ask for help.
This last year I have been having some good results with chelation therapy to help my body get rid of heavy metals. I have many times thought of aircraft mechanics and all the chemicals you must have been exposed to.
Bet you were one of the guys who werent afraid to get his hands dirty ;-)

Hello Jim, nice to see you again, not so nice that you're feeling the way you are. You're in a dark place right now and the best thing you can do is centre yourself inwardly, try and block out all the negativity and blackness and hang in there until this black cloiud passes. Just take each day at a time and try to get through it as best you can. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Each and every one of us has to fight this MonSter and knowing that others share the struggle might give you some strength.

Sometimes this disease can bring us to our knees. And sounds like it is your turn. But you have it in you, you can fight this darkness and come through it. You need to lean on someone though. And sometimes a message board is a place to get that encouragement.

Focus on yourself for a while. Find the healing you need within. (((hugs))) and I hope you feel stronger soon.

What can I say but,
Tank you, Thank you, Thank you........
and sorry I have been away fa so long.....
But hey Its kinda like I just got home so my mind is again wide open, and would love to talk to all you Nice guy's and doll's about anything and everything.
Love to you all....Jim x x x