Although we share our losses with our partners, we don't cope in the same ways. After our first loss I felt closer to my husband. Now after four losses and a year of struggling, I feel so distant from him. I need him now more than anything and he just doesn't seem to understand. I've tried talking to him, but he doesn't make any adjustments. It makes me so sad and alone. I love him though and want to make things better between us. I'm going to give him time and space and hope that in time things become easier. I think the more I hound him, the more he will pull away.
I hope that things get better between you two. Think about what you really want and then try to make choices that will get you there. I know that's hard when our emotions get in the way. Hang in there!

You both need to sit down together and talk. You need to tell each other how you are feeling and try to repair your break down in communication. Some times its not easy to talk to those closest to you, but your partner is an important part of your life and its worth trying to fix it.

The loss of your child is not your fault, its not his either and while you are both hurting this is the time you need to come together and support each other. Theres a famous saying 'the person that can stop you crying is the one who made you cry' and i find it to be so true, you always push away the ones you love the most but a friend once said to me 'its not knowing that you can live with someone that matters, its knowing if you can livr without them' you need to decide if you can live without your partner but more importantly if you want to.

I'm sorry if i sound harsh, i dont mean to. I just think its worth giving it a shot. Good luck huni xxx

Men are so different from women. They aren't usually the ones that want to talk about things. He may need time to think before he's ready to talk. If you "hound" him, it may make it take longer for him to talk to you. Men also want to fix things. They are people of action. They need to be needed. If he feels like he's doing everything wrong and not helping, he won't want to be there if he feels like he's making things worse. I know you have a lot to deal with but if you want him to be there for you, you need to let him know that you'd like to talk (not yell or complain) when he feels up to it and then let him come to you. When he does and he will if you don't hound him, tell him what you need, tell him what would make you feel better. Also try to understand that he may not need to talk about his feelings. He is a man, and men don't do that generally. If you pressure him to talk about his feelings, it may drive him away. Let him know that you need him and tell him exactly what you need from him. Men don't need the same things as women. They don't react the same way. So they don't know what will help. He doesn't understand that he could just listen to you and that would help. I don't know either of you so I could be wrong. A good book for both of you to read is Men are From Mars Women are from Venus. You can probably borrow it from the library and not spend a dime. And it would probably help both of you in communicating to each other. Your message made me think of the book. It gave examples of communication problems and yours sounded like it could have come from this book.