You're right..it is not your fault...what you are feeling is totally normal. I lost my baby four months ago today and I remember the anger..the anger at God, the anger at my body, the anger at pregnant women in general...I was an angry person. Every day life was unbearable. What made me finally decide to talk to my doctor was when I was about ready to chuck the digital cable remote out the window because I couldn't get it to work. That is not me nor has it ever been. Turns out I was going through PPD and I am taking Lexapro. Anxiety/depression runs in my family so this didn't come as a total shock but I also went through PPD after my four year old was born; by comparison, however, that was a walk in the park! The Lexapro has helped--the feelings and the emotions are still there but I am thankfully on more of an even keel.

Honey, it hurts because your baby is gone. And when you lost your baby you lost a piece of you that will never be replaced! Cry if you need to. Scream, do whatever you feel like doing. Coming here is good because you will always find someone to talk with who understands. Journaling is helpful as well, getting everything down on paper and out of you. Most of us here have made memory boxes or books for our babies. I wear a ring on my right hand of a heart entwined around a tiny diamond that I bought to remember her by. I also named her--Angel Elizabeth. You want to hear something kinda silly? I got myself an angel teddy bear from the Little Angels Online Store and I keep that little guy at the ready (he's here with me now). When the pain is overwhelming I grab him and squeeze him tight. It sounds kinda corny but it does help and I do recommend getting yourself a bear to hold. There is just something comforting about them. You can get some adorable bears at www.littleangelsonlinestore.com and at www.aquietrefuge.com but there are some groups that give bears free of charge to grieving aprents; www.missingfootprints.org or www.angelteddybears.org.

Above all, be gentle with yourself and give yourself the time you need to do what you can for you. You are not alone; you are with friends here. Sending you love and prayers.

I'm so sorry for you loss. It is extremely hard to get over losing your baby. In fact, I lost my baby over six months ago and am pregnant again and I still am not over it. I think what you are experiencing is pretty normal. I had a lot of ups and downs, also. It did help me a little to get back to a normal routine, so going back to work may not be a bad idea. Just do what YOU need to do, not what others are expecting you to do. I also found that excercising helped me burn some of my anger off---something about sweating and my muscles aching was great therapy for me. Also, I rarely see pregnant women at my gym, so it was a "safe" place. I will be thinking about you and are here if you need to talk...

ive already thought about getting a tatoo or a ring or something to keep close to me,
i am worried about the depression but there is limitations to what i can do as far as doctors go, i will lose my medical because i only had it through the state cause i was pregnat, my bf gets back in a month from the navy, i just hope i can hold on till then. i think im just going to focus on selling my artwork and selling things on the internet to get by, maybe part time at my job, it just isnt appealing to me to work with customer service right now, i will probably come unglued if i heard a petty complaint because someone was angry that they lost their money, i work in a casino, negative enviroment. im worrried about how this will affect the relationship me and my bf have. i want to try again right away, at first when i found i was pregnat it was scary, then i became exited and made plans, got a crib, hand me downs, and was just pleasantly happy, couldnt wait till i could have an ultrasound for the heartbeat andpic, i was waiting till my bf got home so we could do it together. it just all came crashing down so fast. i just still dont know how i will react to things now. im afraid of myself as well, i cant trust my emotions right now