Firstly, I am so sorry for what you have gone through. Please know that you are not alone. You have a community of support here. Speaking about my losses is the only thing that keeps me going. It helps me cope and to remember that my babies were real even if they didn't make it. I was pregnant. I did become a mother. And so were you, no matter your age. I had mine quite young. I'm 31 now... And one thing I regret, is not loving myself more through it. Not being more forgiving with my younger self. I blamed myself for the feelings I was having and I realize now that what I went through is traumatic and I should have gotten counseling. I wish someone could have told me that its ok to feel the way I do and it's ok to think the dark thoughts I had.

I wish you could know that you are not alone at all. I am here in you need to talk or if you need support. What happened to you was beyond your control. It took me 10 years to get to a place where I can speak openly and confidently about what happened to me. My mother knew I was pregnant and she was disappointed even though i was in college. When I lost the baby, she felt it was the best outcome so I can focus on my future. While I understand what she meant was that she wanted more for my life, it was hard for me to understand her approach when all I felt was pain and longing. Ten years later, we now speak openly about it and she acknowledges that it happened to me and it feels very healing for me that she knows and can talk about it. I don't know what your relationship is with your mother but I do encourage you to speak with her or a friend at some point. Whatever, the outcome, you will feel more accepting with yourself. But only when you are ready. These things can't be rushed. Feel free to reach out to me whenever you like. Wishing you all the best and my thoughts are with you and your baby.

Thanks