Miscarriage Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have experienced the traumatizing event of a miscarriage or a stillbirth. Miscarriage remains one of the most common complication of pregnancy, but that doesn't make it easy to deal with. Join the group and find support in the company of others who know what you're going through.
After learning that I would have to terminate my pregnancy early at 5 weeks I was devistated. Although I knew it was medically necessary it doesn't help me cope with the loss. My body already started to change. My husband and I were excited to have another child. I can't pin point one thing that is making me so depressed because it is a combination of things. First, the D&C procedure was horrific in itself. It was so painful. Then as I was throwing out my gown I saw the tube they used to scrape my baby out laying there all bloody in the garbage. How can they just throw my baby out like that? Secondly, I wanted that baby and even though I would eventually miscarry on my own,I didn't want it to be so. The embryo was not developing correctly, possibly due to toxins introduced during the fertilization such as the large amounts of caffine I was intaking. I don't know what caused it but I didn't want it to be so. I feel so emotionally attached still. I cry all the time but I don't know the exact reason. This happened only four days ago and my body has not changed yet (ie my breast are sore) and that is emotionally difficult. Plus I have to take antibiotics to fight off any potential infection and that is a reminder. There are so many reminders. I can't even begin to think of my husbands pain but I feel distant from him. I dont wana be touched and I cant even say I love you to him. I just feel blank. I feel so many thouhghts and emotions I cant even identify them all. I also feel other effects such as not being able to really think like my brain shut down. last night my husband asked me to pick some songs out to listen to and I couldn't even think of one! I couldn't think at all like my brain gave up from the overload. How do I cope?
I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I know it's hard to see it now but it will get better.
It's a trial for a marriage but be sure that it brings you closer together in the end and doesn't push you further apart. There is a time that you both may need to be apart... for us it was about a week that we were distant but after that we pulled together and talked about it and focused on the future and what we were going to do. For us, after that weeks time we moved forward to focus on our next baby that would need our love and attention and focused on ttc again.
I hope things get better for you and your husband. *hugs*