Hope, Im sorry but after I read your last 2 lines,...I have to admit, I had to giggle a bit!! My BF & I (ever since the moment we found each other), have been very passionate about each other. We both love having sex together & since we moved in together last November, we, to this day, have sex 1-3 times a day. (we were both deprived in our previous marraiges). When we decided to try to get pregnant in April, we didn't change a thing, so we didn't have it in our minds that we were only having sex to make a baby. Actually, My Dr told me to cut him off & stop having it everyday, said it makes it harder to get preg, that his "%$#@" needs to build up for a few days for the best #'s count. But we couldn't stop. We changed nothing. Still did it everyday 2-3 times aday.

But I also think that neither of of thought having sex for a baby was also because I had my 4 mc's 15 years ago & had given up of ever getting pregnant, so I wrote that part of my life out as something that was never going to happen. He did the same. He raised his girlfriends baby at 18 months old until this day, he conciders my BF his dad, but his next wife was older & already into menepause. Neither of us ever thought we would meet & be this happy together. It kind of sucks though, because now that we've found each other, & we both want a child together, our window of baby making is closing fast. Im 41 & he is 46.

There were some days we didn't do it at all, but we (I, lol) made sure that we took no days off from day 8 to day 23 of my cycle. I was told days 11-21 were the best so we just added a few days to the begining & the end, just to be sure).

But, I have always been very fertile, never had a problem getting pregnant within my 1st month of trying, sometimes it took 2 months. I understand that for alot of women, it takes years to get pregnant, but with all 5 of my pregnancies, I have never had the thought of sex for a baby. Maybe its because i just like sex?, lol

You just gota change your way of thinking. You'll have better luck if you don't stress over it so much.

My problem is I have never made it past 12 weeks & Im still childless. Just had my 5th 2 weeks ago, a missed mc that i had to drug induce yesterday.

People kept telling me that if I don't stress while pregnant, maybe it will take, but saying it & doing it are totally different.

& I understand that not every couple is that passionate about each other & are not into sex as much as we are, so I guess maybe I can't help you?

I do wish you all of the best of luck though,

Try lots of foreplay, do something kinky...I am serious, and if you don't get pregnant, atleast you had fun trying!

Enzo27 and Isnider32 I agree and will use your advise:) Enzo27, when we first started being intimate in our relationship, we were all over each other! And I I've been researching and learned the samething your doctor said. Having sex everyday when trying to conceive is not always best for spirm supply purposes. Its all about timing when getting pregnant. But I'm going to try and enjoy sex again and not think about it as baby making:)

Enzo27, with my previous pregnancies it took almost a yr to conceive so on top of everything else I was really disappointed. Have you been treated/ungergone testing for reoccuring pregnancy loss??

hope2012,
No, I have not been tested other than having a dye test done 12 yrs ago to see if my uterus was shaped correctly. Last week she suggested that I go see an infertility Dr. Im not sure my ins will cover that, & I don't have thousands of $$ for there kind of testing.

Plus, we're at the age where time is limited, I don't have yrs for testing. I may try 1 more time, but if it happens again, i have to be done. I can't handle more than 6, its too mentally debilitating for me.

As far as your passion for each other goes, do like Insider32 said, do something different &/or kincky!

Some nights & days, i'll go take a shower, & then call him into the bedroom & be waiting for him naked, or i'll put something on that he likes, or I'll we'll just be sitting on the couch & I'll climb onto his lap & start kissing his neck, or I'll wear almost nothing while cooking his dinner... I try to change it up every day, so it keeps things from getting mroutine & mondane.

Good luck to you & just have fun!!!!!

We did totally. We started to make jokes about it because it was hard to take it seriously or passionately because we knew we were trying to make a baby. There were times we couldn't stop laughing. Hubby would be like deposit made...and I would be like you have 5 minutes I need to be somewhere. My friends who had experienced MC's and I started calling it the TTC...trying to conceive tension. Because when you are just having sex to have a baby there becomes tension and disappointment when it doesn't happen right off the bat. We didn't do do it everyday...every other day and a few days after my test said I ovulated. Keep a sense of humor. Most importantly don't let the need for a baby interfer with the loving relationship you have with your spouse. :) Good luck

Hope, I'm so sorry for your loss. I did experience something similar when my husband and I started trying again. It was really hard for me and I'll be honest I was having sex just so I could get pregnant. Need less to say i couldn't get pregnant. One of my good friends suggested acupuncture so I could ease my mind. I gave it a try and somehow sex didn't seem like work anymore and after a month of starting acupuncture I was pregnant with my baby boy. He is one month old and I just want to say that I am glad I tried again. Maybe this can help you too.

I agree with some of these comments. When you are just having sex to get pregnant it takes something away from the relationship. My boyfriend and I decided that we were not going to try because we got pregnant not trying the first time, we were making love to each other. It cant feel like a machine thats being used. Put love into it and put the baby making in the very back of your mind and just focus on the person your with, the one you love and know that when you get pregnant your child was made out of love.

It's a passionate killer. I am seriously fed up with sex now. We both say, Oh No it's SEX day and I want it over with.

I like to have sex when am ready too, not when I have too, because the OKP has detected my surge.

Can't wait until I FINALLY FALL PREGANT, then I can have sex because am feeling it.

I am 4 months in and I hope I don't take too much longer am doing my sex to have sex as often as possible, but i can't do it everyday and I work, so not always easy to fit in sometimes, am so tired sometimes.

Fingers crossed I have done enough this month, if not then it's round 5 next month, boring!!! LOL

:-)

I'm currently going through the same thing. A few months ago I made a trip to the "toy store" to spice things up a bit. It has helped alot, now I think of it as exciting and wanting it more; before it felt like a job. If you're not opposed to that I suggest giving it a try.

I agree with babyfever, my bf & I visit the "toy store" together & it is a really big helper. If you feel that it's akward for you, or your nervous with the idea, of doing things infront of him or including him...THATS A GOOD THING & you should try. If your nervous, shy or just plain embarrassed...you should by all means take the plunge & do it! Because thats exactly what the women on here need, mind distractions. "Sex for making baby" on the mind. You most certainly won't be thinking about making a baby...I promise you that!! lol!

I'm glad I'm not alone ladies! I look foward to falling pregnant again and I can get back to really enjoying sex:) Getting pregnant is work! Hopefully we will get pregnant again soon, but most importantly I go on to carry a healthy baby. I wish all of you luck and baby dust that are trying again too:)
@ Enzo 27, I had a dye study done too and nothing was found to be wrong. In spite of it all, I still think its still hope for us:)

My advice (we've used a lot of them!) is to use the tests to know your cycle, but not to dictate when you will try. Your best chances of conceiving are actually right BEFORE you ovulate to the day of or after ovulation. So we saw testing positive as more of a getting excited moment: oh my, we could have the spermies inside going to work right now!!!
I imagine it's hard after 2 failed pregnancies, so I would think that is another issue. Maybe try to spice up your love life in another way. Have you read 50 shades? I have it as a book on tape, and let me say that it will get anyone in the mood. When you're feeling less sexy, try erotica or some new toy or something.

Hope this helps and is..um...fruitful.