Hey all,

Well today marks 5 years since my last hit of weed. It is not the sobriety date I celebrate, though I recognize it. I count my first day clean and sober from any intoxicant including alcohol as my "sobriety date" which is still a few months away.

You know that last year or so when I wanted to quit, I didn't have a recovery program at first, but I believed a spiritual connection with a higher power could help - I believed in steps 1, 2 and 3. Later I sought out marijuana anonymous online because I felt like a freak, a sober pothead (I was going months at a time weed free on my own) I just needed like minded people who understood and could support me. Going to my first MA meeting at a convention changed my life, and I learned about SOBRIETY including abstinance from marijuana and all mind and mood altering chemicals including alcohol, so I identified my sober date and continued going to MA and added AA, too, where I eventually realized how much I belonged.

My first sponsor or sober member who has worked the 12 steps who could take me through them, was found through MA online. I was not yet comfortable asking someone in person, but a few months later I finally did and still have the same sponsor.

The 12 step recovery program identifies alcohlism / addiction as an illness that is not just about putting down the drug of choice, but about using spiritual principles to live a better life. For those of us who quit pot and still find life miserable or unmanageable, there is a solution. Of course the detox process takes a while, and learning to have feelings in our lives as the numbness / highness goes away can be overwhelming. But after that, there can still be a giant void left behind that we tried to use pot to fill, and can tend to try to fill with other things - addicts are addicts! I'm really grateful for MA and AA and all those who have come before me. I realized I wanted longterm sobriety to be able to influence others who were new the same way others have for me. That is the 12th step "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others / alcoholics / marijuana addicts and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

The literature and an understanding of it are a big part of recovery, studied with a sponsor, on my own and at book study meetings, which I love. At MA meetings we sell MA's Life with Hope, AA's big book of Alcholics Anonymous, and AA's Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. This is where I find recovery. Daily 12 step meetings is where I find others who can inspire me and who I can also inspire, and we do this together - it is a we program. I look for the similarities not the differences.

Why I am saying all this is in case you want to know how I did it. Not everyone takes same path - and 12 step programs draw others through attraction - and the attraction for me is to be longterm sober and to live life using a spiritual sense of standards that help me feel good about myself and my interaction with the world. Life is good!