Oh, no! I'm so sorry. This sounds like something you two need to figure out in person. Any way you could get together before a decision is made?

At this point, it's best to communicate in such a way you're not pressuring him or making him decide right away on things.

I feel he may be taking the back step, and you should try giving him a bit of space to get his head together especially since he's been quiet after you asked him that question.

Before me and my SO took a break (as I don't think it's officially a break up), I asked him the same question - if he wants to start seeing/dating other people. He said he doesn't have the time for it while I replied that I didn't want to.

Normally, guys go to the cave when they know a bigger commitment is at hand. This is when you mess things up further by pushing (even the simple questions could be stressful for them!). Instead, make him feel you are going to be okay either way you get to live with him or not in a few months time. That's basically giving off the signal that you are confident and independent on your own (and he'd be making the biggest mistake if he does decide to end things).

Let him know how you feel - and speak at a time you know he's not stressed or tired. He already knows you are anticipating the move, and this is his chance to think whether or not this really is for him. Give him that space, let him hang out with friends and enjoy life as he should. This means, you also give yourself space, you hang out with friends and enjoy life as you should. It's better to come out clean before you actually move closer or together then realize all too late it's not what you both want.

I'm sorry but that last advise will make you sound like a door mat! It sure does sound like he's taking a step and and possibly wants to date other people but doesn't want to hurt your feelings by saying so. LDR's take a huge amount of a commitment and trust and right now it sounds like you have/should feel very little of both of those. I feel for you but PLEASE put yourself first and be strong. You deserve a man who will never waiver his feelings/commitment towards you!

Thank you for your advice. I guess all I can do right now as you said..take a step back myself and look out for me. I do miss him, but my past relationship, he also said he needed time to "think" and ended up sleeping with many women. "didn't know what he wanted" I know in my heart that I am a very good women, who would never hurt anyone and I know I don't deserve it either. I don't understand why anyone needs a "break" unless they may want to see other people, or not sure about being with them. '
I want someone like alison said...a man who will never waiver his feelings/commitment towards you! through good times and bad times. I want to know, even if we are going through a bad time,, I don't have to worry that he isn't going to cheat on me or need a "break" to think etc.
It's like here I go again... I know I have to keep on moving.. I have no choice. Maybe one day, the fun, happy me will come back. It's been so long...
Thanks everyone, always love to hear what you think.

And that is exactly why you should take a step back...

And give him the space he needs.

And he if does decide to date other people; then you get the answer what you are looking for. :)

Best of luck and hang in there!

I know that is what I need to do, but it is so hard! I finally talked to him tonight, and he just keeps saying he doesn't know. How do you not know after 2 years of telling me how much he loves me and wants us to live togther? I am having a hard time with this.
he starts to get so frustrated when I tell him I love him, etc. I know I need to leave him alone.. but it hurts so much. I finallly gave love another chance. which I was so scared after my last marriage, but I trust him.
I know I don't want him to say things that aren't true either, but I just wish he would tell me he loves me and he's sorry for all this and just to forget it, and we're ok.
I hate this !

I remember your previous post about this guy:

http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Long-Distance-Relationships-LDR/forum/12612562-question

I would suggest taking everyone's advice there and letting this one go. What he's done to you in the past is boderline abuse.

I went back and read one of my post awhile ago. yes he treated me rude at times, but he was very jealous about my x. If we would get together again, and move to where he lives, he wouldn't be around my x anymore. Then it didn't help when my two neighbor ladies tried to break us apart saying that my x was here all the time when he was away, WHICH they were NOT. But they didn't like me because I was the property manager and one of them stole my RX out of my bathroom and I called her on it. When he was here the last time, he had found an email that was a few months ago saying that he loved me and wanted us back together. Which I didn't. I meant to throw it away, but I took it to my counselor to show it to her to ask her what is the right way to handle this... and I forgot to throw it away.. and Eric found it.. then those women said that stuff.. he was here for two weeks and we fought about it. We had fun off and on, but between the distance, and the jealousy of my x..I think that is what happened. BUT we were still planning on my moving there this spring, or somwhere together. Anywhere but here.

but now he has a job.. now he doesn't need me for support or anyone to talk to. he said he met a women at a job fair and they were hanging out. BUt he still says he sees signs that makes him think of him and I, and wonders sometimes if we should be together. he always says he doens't know..

I honestly didn't do anything to him. I did not cheat on him, but he treats me like I did. he said there is a part of him that doesn't trust me, and believes those women. That is because he is so jealous of my x.

I miss Eric so much and our communication every night. We would laugh and have fun. Like i said..he was my best friend. For now I am alone, and all I want to do is call him. I try not to, but I did try a little while ago.. it was like around 8:00 pm there and he didn't answer. I can only guess he is out with someone. that breaks my heart. I was giving everything of me to him. '

After my past.. I was giving love another chance. He promised me he wouldn't hurt me.. and I hurt. I can't keep my mind busy, I am always thinking of him. AND I am sure he isn't thinking of me..he is too excited about having his job and whoever he is seeing.

I just wish he would call me up and say he's sorry lets make this work. i don't want to give up.. but I really don't think he will. I know it's time to move on.. but I want to keep hope. he gave me hope.. he would say.. I don't want to give you false hope, but....

I wish I could just go to sleep and have all this be a bad dream.

For the last few days, I've been reading so much on what we should and need to get through a break up... but really,, how do you do it when you put your wall down and trusted the man that you let in?

I miss him so much, and i know he probably isn't missing me now that he hs another person to "hang out" with. Why would he? I want to call him, text him, email him, ANYTHING for him to think twice. I know in my heart, that I didn't do anything to make this happen.

Now I feel that all I was just someone to help him a long until he found someone else, or unti he had a job. Just someone to keep him company.

I know the long distance was hard, but he knew what he was getting himself into, and we had plans! And he bailed.

He is on my mind all the time. How do you REALLY be happy again. This has happened to me way to many times.

I'm so sorry for your pain. I wish I had good answers for you, but I don't. Just sympathy and a big hug.