holidays/special occasions are always the loniliness times .
I know you have a lot to do,but perhaps volunteer somewhere and give yourself a new purpose to get up

Well press forwards! Why didnt website let you reset password? Try contacting them with email or phone call? Try okcupid.com its free and less creepy than plentyoffish is! Try meetup.com too singles mingle with that everywhere in world as well as just gals and marrieds and gays and dog walkers and and and everyone!

I have joined a meet up for volunteers there has not been one yet. I would like to volunteer, I think one gets so much out of it. is okcupid.com different then cupid.com ? that one wasn't free. I haven't tried again with the other site, I really need to. I love peanuts and esp. snoopy, I pulled out a big standing snoopy decked out for Christmas and he makes me feel happier. an important thing I had to do today isn't happening and I am very co fused about it, it is a ton of paper work, I bhave given up to easily, maybe after lunch.

Sounds like you're overwhelmed and Christmas isn't helping. The holiday weighs heavily upon us with the expectations of others. I am having a dilemma myself. My one son and his wife adopted a special needs little boy. He's a sweet little fella but severely challenged physically and I'm not sure where he is mentally either, but I know my daughter-in-law expects a gift for him, and because I can't read minds, I know no matter what I get it won't be right. I just wish everyone was easier to get along with. They aren't though, so I'm feeling my own brand of dread. I haven't put up any decorations yet, that's how enthusiastic I am about Christmas too. Sorry you are feeling bad. Hope things work out nicely for you.

sara59 have you asked your son or daughter in law what gift would be a good choice, I wouldn't know what to get given the very sad situation. I found out last night that neither my daughter and 1 of my sons wont be here for Christmas, that has me very sad. my son is going to his g/f house, they have been together awhile and I guess I understand, but back in the day, I would go to my parents if I wasn't married, call me old fashioned.... my daughter is the same thing her long time b/f wants to spend time with his children, he is older then she is, which I get, and she would never come without him. :( it will work out somehow. I had a bad evening, over 2 hours on the computer and phone trying to do all the filing for Medicaid supplemental assistance, I started crying on the phone I was so overwhelmed. here in ny it is no longer just going to apply for Medicaid it is an entire process of health insurance, the woman finally said there are people who can do this for you!! she said after I started to get upset she thought of it. after we hung up I had a melt down, crying and angry. I just need a little help right now, I hate to do it and it is so darn hard. feeling lousy this morning, all nerved up and scared.

Ann, I really understand you feeling so overwhelmed with a long process of applying for medicaid. Have someone help you with it. It will take a load off of you. No more stress.

that is what I am going to do, I wish I had known there were people who did this in the beginning.

I am sorry your having such a bad day, hope it gets better for you. help with that stuff is good, I know it gets overwhelming and hard to understand. hope you get some things done, so you can rest your mind a bit

No, you aren't alone. Yes, we all feel this way sometimes. No, you won't always feel like this, Yes, the world is a better place with you in it. God Bless. and hugs too, GB

I hope you will feel better soon. I too woke up feeling bad and nauseas and w the runs. But that's par. It's unusual when I wake up and feel good.
I am trying to get energy to pull my tree out and stand it up. Also volunteered to make tamales for a party Saturday. It is the only Christmas celebration I am having with other people. It's not just the making of them, it's the moving through the clutter and the washing of the equipment and working with very little work space. I want to feel better. I don't have much to look forward to, but I like to make Christmas morning nice for myself and my pets anyway. Just been feeling not well lately.
ps. glad u found help...filling out forms for any kind of aid is a pain. I hope you will qualify for what you need.

Applying for medicaid almost sent me over the edge too. I told my daughter, it's like you are supposed to know everything without any information. I broke out in hives over it and I'm still scratching. I'm sure you're not the first person to break down over the phone with them so don't feel bad. I wish I had cried, I went into a rage instead like a crazy old lady yelling about the government. But once they get all your information, it goes pretty quickly, I don't know what I'm going to do about the gift for my new grandson. My daughter-in-law feels if you have to ask then you are stupid. I asked my son and he shrugged his shoulders, it feels a lot like applying for Medicaid.

My therapist (whom I found 1 yr ago) and I..worked out a ritual for first getting up. Which time was the worst of the entire day for me.

The instant I was awake and knew I could no longer go back
..I would within seconds get the stove turned on -- thinking hot chocolate here. And PDQ there would be milk out; I'd prepare that nice drink BEFORE I was near to being fully clothed....

It was something I always could do and do right. Regardless how jittery I'd be. I'd never have feelings of inadequacy. During the previous day I'd make sure all of the makings were on hand.

The fine touch was getting it to just the right temperature. 'Cause I was not gonna be twiddling my thumbs, waiting to get my blood sugar up.

Librarians I should mention: are *wizards* at Internet problems. If someone is lame about sending ya' your old password...turn a librarian loose on them.
hehe . . . / C . . . . . hope U get some relief soon

thank you all so much for such great support and advice. it is so good to know you are not alone. I have screwed up even more, I cant find my insurance card, had to call yesterday for a new one as they want a copy of the back and front, they told me 7-10 days! I will be cutting it close to the jan. 1st deadline. I couldn't get myself to do anything about the situation yesterday, I have to kick ass and call today. I still feel totally overwhelmed and now is the time of year I am overwhelmed to begin with. I am hosting Christmas, I don't want to, have no choice, and I have done nothing to prepare. worst yet I don't even care. I have my own set of rituals to get me by on a given day. I too have the coffee all ready to press the start button the night before and when I was working everything was set up , lunch included and ready to go. it does help but still the anxiousness comes, more since I have been home recovering. why is money such a stressor and make one feel like a loser? hugs all and thank you

Why not do a potluck for christmas?

it kinda is a potluck in that everyone, well almost, brings something on the menu. we have done this for years when it was at my sisters and it helps so much. I am keeping things very simple, just 4 main dishes, appetizers and desserts. I have put off everything, and I wont go to any store today, way to crowded, I cant take crowds and I can go tomorrow. I have only the tree up, the wreath is still laying on the table in the porch, I just don't care. and I wonder why I a lonely and anxious, I don't care about anything it seems, except what I need to do for my recovery. in a 10 min. phone call with a navigator from Medicaid and the nystateof health, he figured out my income for 2015 and for last this year and said I do not qualify. all this after over 2 hours of misery, I should of known better. I found out that my son who had said he would be willing to help with the medical bilss as long as I applied for Medicaid, told my daughter that he isn't happy about doing it, he wants to save for other things. I hate asking him as he always makes me feel ashamed and very small, today I am calling and saying the situation is taken care of and I don't need the help after all. I don't want to have anything knowing it is not something he wants to do. I will never ask again. this has made me hurt and feel sad, but not unexpected, david is always like this, I love him, but he is the total opposite of my other 2. today looms ahead, have to get a script, should start cleaning, as I am not going to the store, and just plain get organized. all I want to do is my PT exercises go to the gym and ride the bike, and maybe take a walk, so very selfish. I used to love to have the Christmas music station on, this year I cant stand it. does anyone have any ideas that can help me get in the spirit? all these things just compound loneliness.