Loneliness Support Group
Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any...
This is a posting for lonely people who have physical or mental disabilities and also for survivors of child abuse. Please take the time to read and understand this entire posting before commenting on it.
The following will be difficult for some people to accept, and some people will automatically reject it and condemn it without considering it, but I will go ahead and present it to the group. I expect some people to accuse me of being a bad person for stating the following. Some people may think that what I am stating is dangerous because they don't know any better and are locked into their unhealthy view of life.
Ultimately, for us to become healthy, well-adjusted, normal people, we need to participate in what life has to offer us. There is no talk therapy, no prescription drug, or any other psychiatric treatment, that works as well as being active and socializing. While talk therapy and prescription drugs do keep people alive and functioning through the worst of their conditions, they are ultimately not enough by themselves. And though some people may rely on these things for their entire lives, for others they are not a lifetime solution for their conditions.
I myself have been lulled into a false sense of wellness by prescription drugs. I admit it. I couldn't cope with my past or with my present surroundings. I went the mental illness route: get on disability, take psychiatrist prescribed drugs for depression, and then went home to a tiny rented room in a rundown hotel and locked the door and watched television while the years went by and I got older. I tried my best to ignore the fact that I was living in poverty, and that every last one of my neighbors were all convicted felons and violent mentally ill people who were so dysfunctional that they couldn't or wouldn't do any of the things that normal healthy people do. I deeply regret losing twenty years of my life to living this way.
I am just beginning to learn that this isn't working and never will work. Taking pills and watching television while the years slip rapidly away is a waste of the potential life that I might have. I am now doing my best to get involved in life. I am searching for a church to be an active member of, though it's really hard for me, considering my past as a horribly abused child. I attended a few churches that were not suited to my needs before finally finding a church this past Sunday where they people are normal and healthy. In fact, so much so that for the first half hour that I sat among the congregation I had to fight to keep myself from crying because it was so different from what I have experienced in life. And today I begin my attempt to look for a paying job by going to an orientation for a county-run program that helps people with disabilities (I have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and depression) search for work. I hope to find other ways of being active and participating in society besides belonging to a church and having a job.
I would like to strongly encourage each of you to begin in any way you can to participate in life. Become active and start socializing now. It's not too late for you, no matter your age. The only thing that matters is that you make a start and don't stop no matter how much disappointment you encounter and no matter how hopeless you may feel at times. Yes, you're going to experience some pain during this process. Okay, so we've had difficult pasts, and that may make our present lives challenging. But you can do this. I know you can if I can.
Let's not make excuses for why we can't do this. It doesn't matter if you have a disability or medical condition that you think limits how much you can do. It doesn't matter if you are shy or fearful. Let's not discourage other people in the group from doing this. It is safe. It is normal. It is healthy. You either participate in life or you live out your years in isolation and die having done nothing with your potential. I want to hear that you are willing to try.
The following will be difficult for some people to accept, and some people will automatically reject it and condemn it without considering it, but I will go ahead and present it to the group. I expect some people to accuse me of being a bad person for stating the following. Some people may think that what I am stating is dangerous because they don't know any better and are locked into their unhealthy view of life.
Ultimately, for us to become healthy, well-adjusted, normal people, we need to participate in what life has to offer us. There is no talk therapy, no prescription drug, or any other psychiatric treatment, that works as well as being active and socializing. While talk therapy and prescription drugs do keep people alive and functioning through the worst of their conditions, they are ultimately not enough by themselves. And though some people may rely on these things for their entire lives, for others they are not a lifetime solution for their conditions.
I myself have been lulled into a false sense of wellness by prescription drugs. I admit it. I couldn't cope with my past or with my present surroundings. I went the mental illness route: get on disability, take psychiatrist prescribed drugs for depression, and then went home to a tiny rented room in a rundown hotel and locked the door and watched television while the years went by and I got older. I tried my best to ignore the fact that I was living in poverty, and that every last one of my neighbors were all convicted felons and violent mentally ill people who were so dysfunctional that they couldn't or wouldn't do any of the things that normal healthy people do. I deeply regret losing twenty years of my life to living this way.
I am just beginning to learn that this isn't working and never will work. Taking pills and watching television while the years slip rapidly away is a waste of the potential life that I might have. I am now doing my best to get involved in life. I am searching for a church to be an active member of, though it's really hard for me, considering my past as a horribly abused child. I attended a few churches that were not suited to my needs before finally finding a church this past Sunday where they people are normal and healthy. In fact, so much so that for the first half hour that I sat among the congregation I had to fight to keep myself from crying because it was so different from what I have experienced in life. And today I begin my attempt to look for a paying job by going to an orientation for a county-run program that helps people with disabilities (I have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and depression) search for work. I hope to find other ways of being active and participating in society besides belonging to a church and having a job.
I would like to strongly encourage each of you to begin in any way you can to participate in life. Become active and start socializing now. It's not too late for you, no matter your age. The only thing that matters is that you make a start and don't stop no matter how much disappointment you encounter and no matter how hopeless you may feel at times. Yes, you're going to experience some pain during this process. Okay, so we've had difficult pasts, and that may make our present lives challenging. But you can do this. I know you can if I can.
Let's not make excuses for why we can't do this. It doesn't matter if you have a disability or medical condition that you think limits how much you can do. It doesn't matter if you are shy or fearful. Let's not discourage other people in the group from doing this. It is safe. It is normal. It is healthy. You either participate in life or you live out your years in isolation and die having done nothing with your potential. I want to hear that you are willing to try.
Many times I feel just that way too. There are retired CEO's who sit on the board of a dozen or so companies and do NOTHING, when they could do SO VERY MUCH.