I know exactly where you are coming from. I too often have the negative to share and nothing more. Life isn't always rosy but people do not want to hear our sad stories over and over, as it is often to much for them to bare.

I haven't found anyone who understands my pain or who can except that I'm not with it everyday. In the world outside of DS, compassion is had to find.

Don't give up hope though. I refuse to believe that I will be lonely forever and that one day in the future, I will meet someone who is patient, understanding and forgiving of me. I hope you too will find someone to befriend as you are not asking too much, just what we all want.

I feel similar except I don't own a computer so I can't get online much. It is hard to converse when nothing is going in the right direction and interests seem to drop off. I think this is a good group for you because we are all in the same boat. Real hugs feel good. The ones we get here are not the same but the feelings are still there inside. Maybe you can find some nice hope through this group. Someone who is in our boat may have an idea as to how she/he got out of it.

i am the same, though i do not contend with the conditions you do, on the outside i may appear as anyone else wandering around this world, but on the inside i am dying, being eaten up by my own saddness, the only thing i can say is stay the course things can get better, at least thats what i am hoping

Don't give up! If being on here all the time helps you then go for it. There are people from all over the world, so there's bound to be someone on to talk to most of the time. Friends share everything, negative and positive, not just positive things. I think friends get frustrated, not because others are sad, but because its frustrating not be be able to do anything to help. Keep at it and don't give up.

I love listening to negative stuff!! :)

I like positive stuff, too, of course -- but it has to be real. If there's one thing I can't stand, it's phony optmism, fake hope, and namby-pamby positivity. All meaningless.

By nature, I'm about as positive as they come -- but life can be painful and lonely and wretched and godawful, and just plain suck. And I often feel very negative because of that -- and quite frankly, I think that's the normal reaction to have.

And when that is the case, it doesn't help me at all to pretend things are fine and "focus on the positive." (Ugh.)

I'm plenty thankful for the good stuff in my life, but there are times when the negative is simply overwhelming. And I think that needs to be acknowledged.

You are welcome to vent or complain or cry or whine to me or share your negativity with me anytime!

Hugs to you, hardycat.

You get what you focus on in life. It's kind of a harsh statement, but so true. Maybe that's what people are trying to relay to you when they want you to think positivly. Yes, negativity is a part of thoughts and sometimes we have to dig deep to find some "plus signs" in life.

catbird -- "You get what you focus on in life." -- I just don't see how that can possibly be true. Unless magic is at work or something.

People who have lost spouses and children to accidents or illnesses (or worse, like drug addiction or murder); people who are suffering from terrible illnesses, etc. --it's simply non-sensical to say such events were brought about by focusing on these things. I mean, come on.

Yes, there is def. such a thing as being overly negative, too negative, always negative, etc. And yes, there is something to be said for being positive when possible. Absolutely.

But I think we were talking about negativity on a different plane, here.

I also feel that some people simply want to "be heard" -- and if all they ever get from other people in response to sharing their pain is "stay positive" -- that can seem really invalidating, I think.

I'm fighting negativity too. I'm always trying to find something positive to relay to people, but it's not what's in my heart and mind. Or my life.

you pretty much nailed how I feel.

I really like the comments from wheresmyhair - insightful and wise. Phony optimism and cheerfulness is challenging to deal with, and I will take someone's moans and groans any day! I think there has to be a balance, but that balance is difficult to acheive. If all you have is negativity, then it's valid, don't let anyone invalidate your feelings - but I think you are correct in that sometimes people cannot handle it. I'd try to share only with people you can trust to hear you and let you be you, meanwhile I would be looking for positives when you can.